


Much Ado About Kate

by Rainboq



Series: An Arcadian Werewolf [5]
Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Kate is just doing her best, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Struggling with Sexuality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:54:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26794711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainboq/pseuds/Rainboq
Summary: The direct sequel toChloe and the Beast.In the aftermath of the encounter at the cabin, Kate is left reeling. Chloe is in critical condition, she has blood on her hands and the world doesn't make sense anymore. What's a girl to do?
Relationships: Kate Marsh/Chloe Price, Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Chloe Price, Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Kate Marsh, Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Kate Marsh/Chloe Price
Series: An Arcadian Werewolf [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1790380
Comments: 223
Kudos: 102





	1. Hospital

Kate watched Max pacing the waiting room, acting out the anxiety that was coiling in her gut amidst the roil of emotions.  _ I hope we made it in time… Maybe if I’d acted faster, or made Chloe stay in the cabin… _

She held up her hands, they hadn’t stopped trembling since she’d stuffed the freshly fired revolver into her bag during the mad drive from the cabin. The maybes and what ifs her mind kept conjuring swirled around that single, unifying fact.

Kate Marsh had killed a man.

Not just any man, but Nathan Prescott. Her classmate.

She’d killed someone, and there wasn’t a speck of red on her hands.

It felt like they should be soaked in blood, that the pits of Hell should have opened on the spot and swallowed her whole.

But they hadn’t, time had kept moving, the world had kept spinning and Chloe had lain there in a twisted heap. Kate had been able to hear the gurgling in her breathing and the agony in her eyes. Her heart had broken to see the normally proud and cocky woman she felt so many things for in such a state.

And she’d killed Nathan to stop it from being worse.

Or had it been because he’d dared to hurt her in the first place. The whole moment was a jumbled confused mess of thoughts and emotions. Was it murder if she’d killed him to defend Chloe, to protect Max and to rescue Rachel?

Either way, she’d violated a commandment.

_ Thou shalt not kill. _

And she had killed.

Max’s hand on her shoulder snapped her out of her thoughts and she was standing there in front of her, soulful eyes brimming with concern. “Kate? Are you okay?”

A million responses flashed through her head, mostly about how Chloe was the one they should be worried about. “I’m… fine. Thanks for asking.”

Max’s concerned face softened and her thumb started rubbing Kate’s shoulder, the simple contact makes her skin tingle. “I called your name like three times…”

She took a long, deep breath before nodding, her hands worrying the hem of her shirt. “I-I’m just… shaken up.”

Max nodded and sat down next to her in a heap. “I know what you mean. We’re just lucky I was able to…”

“Yeah, I… don’t think I could have driven like that…” Kate placed her own shaking hand onto Max’s shoulder and with a gentle groan Max leaned into her until her arm was wrapped around her and the werewolf’s head was tucked into her neck. 

Max’s head bobbed in acknowledgement and she made a little whining sound in her throat. “I… I can’t think about if…”

The two lapsed into silence. She couldn’t help but marvel at how easy this close proximity was. A few weeks ago, and she’d have been red faced and stammering. Instead she just felt… It was hard to place anything without sliding back into the morass of awful things churning in her gut. And the longer she spent with Max like this, the longer until she had to face them.

She fixed her eyes on the ticking clock across the waiting room, the only thing there that indicated if time was passing at all. It felt like it shouldn’t be, it felt like the whole world should have been like Kate’s, balanced on a knife edge waiting to see if Chloe Price lived or died.

Chloe Price who she shared her first kiss with, the taste of old cigarettes and cheap chapstick still lingering in her mouth. Chloe Price who had made friends with a werewolf she didn’t even know was Max. Chloe Price who was always full of sharp wit, bubbling energy and eyes sparkling with mirth. Those images warred in her mind with those of Chloe smashing into the cabin and crumbling like a thrown and discarded toy.

And then the memories of Nathan charging at Chloe, snarling, murderous intent written plain in his eyes. She quietly thanked God for his providence in having the gun land so she had only needed to dash a short distance out of the cabin to grab it, and for guiding her aim true.

Maybe God had been with her in those moments, so that she might save Chloe.

The thought gave her a little comfort against the guilt and the shame.

Max stirred, her head jerking up and she pulled away from Kate, “Joyce is here.”

Kate swallowed hard as she quickly smoothed out her clothing, doing her best to look somewhat put together. The woman who came crashing through the doors made her feel like an idiot for worrying about her appearance. Joyce’s face was makeupless and streaked with tears, her hair and dress clearly showing that Max had woken her out of bed. Max sprang out of her chair and the two crashed together in a tight hug as both sobbed. Kate’s heart ached as she watched their embrace, guilt bubbling out of the cauldron of emotions.  _ If I’d acted faster, or sooner… _

Her thought was stolen away as another figure entered, stiff and clearly angry. Recognition hit her like a jolt and her fists clenched.  _ David Madsen. _ She tried to push the idea of him hitting Chloe out of her mind and got to her feet. He noticed her, a questioning look on his face before his eyes flicked over to Max and something else flashed over his face. Whatever the expression was, she didn’t like it. It took a moment, but eventually he opened his mouth and asked the question they’d hastily prepared an answer for. “What happened?”

Max was too busy sobbing into Joyce’s chest, so Kate had to tell the story. She tried and failed to keep the waiver and emotion out of her voice. “We were hiking, looking for spots for Max and I to take pictures and sketch. We… lost track of time and before we knew it was night as we headed back to the truck.”

David’s lips were pulled tight but he nodded for her to continue, Joyce’s head turned towards her. It shattered Kate’s heart into a million pieces to have to lie to a mother in distress. “A-and… She tripped and fell off the path and… it was a long way down.”

David grunted something and Joyce gasped, worry blazing on her face like a neon sign. Kate pressed on. “We-we were really lucky because she hit a big tree branch on the way down and then landed on a lower part of the path.”

David’s eyes narrowed. “It was a switchback?”

Suddenly there was a mass of emotions blocking her throat, but she had to push through, her voice cracking. “Y-yeah…. We… carried her back to the truck as quick as we could…”

Joyce’s arms were around her as well in a moment and Kate was tugged into the warm embrace with Max. “Thank you so much, both of you. If she’d been alone…”

Kate had to swallow a few times to clear the lump from her throat. Her spirit rebelled against the blatant lies, her soul yearning to speak truth. But she couldn’t, how could she explain to Chloe’s distraught mother that her daughter was mauled by an angry werewolf?

Joyce released the pair and Max practically collapsed into Kate’s arms, still wracked with sobs. She held the fragile werewolf tight as she watched Joyce make her way over to the nurse’s station.

None of it felt real as the nurse led Joyce out of the room. Kate’s eyes focused back on the ticking clock, it took three minutes and fifty seven seconds for her to return, but not a single moment felt real. It had to be a dream, she would wake up any moment now. Please.

“T-They say… She b-broke three ribs,” Joyce’s voice cracked, brittle with emotion, as if she was about to fall to the floor and break apart at any moment. “…And… Her lung w-was… punctured…”

Max tensed against Kate and drew her head away from her neck. “I-Is she…”

Joyce sagged and collapsed into a chair. “They… don’t know yet. She’s still in surgery.”

Max moved to sit down next to Joyce but David’s hands clamped onto both their shoulders. It was probably meant to be a comforting gesture, but it was clumsy and just made the both of them tense. “Are you girls safe to get back to the dorms?”

Kate swallowed and nodded. “I… think I’m okay to drive.”

The hand left her shoulder. “You should head back to the dorms and get some rest.”

Max spun around and snarled out, “I am not leaving my girlfriend!”

David flinched before he nodded and turned his attention to Kate. “What about you, are you going to stay?”

Kate glanced to Max, who gave her a small nod. Right, she needed to stash the gun… “Y-yeah… I can take Chloe’s truck back to campus and come back with it in the morning.”

David’s eyebrow raised before he slowly agreed. “If you feel safe in that rust bucket, go ahead.”

Max pulled her into a tight hug. “We’ll call you if there’s any change.”

It was strange, climbing into the driver’s seat of Chloe’s truck. In the few short days she’d known the woman, it had seemed like her throne. The driver’s seat was utterly and uniquely Chloe’s own.

Anyone else behind the battered, rough worn wheel felt like blasphemy.

She slot the key into the ignition and did her best to remember the driving lessons with her dad.

With a breath she rattled through the checklist in her mind.

  1. Foot on the break, gear in neutral, clutch in.
  2. Turn the key, wait for the engine to catch.
  3. Set the vehicle in reverse, shoulder check, let off the break.



The truck slowly rolled out into the cramped Wendy’s parking lot across from the hospital and she turned the wheel, hand over hand to get it pointed in the right direction. 

  1. Apply brakes and clutch, put vehicle in first.
  2. Slowly release clutch and apply slight gas.



The truck rolled slowly forwards under near idle power. The actions started to become automatic, like she was driving her family’s old and battered minivan.

  1. Turn signal on, shoulder check at the parking lot exit.



The road was dead quiet in the early morning hour.

  1. Apply gas and merge into the flow of traffic.



The drive to Blackwell was a quiet, lonely one. Kate longed for Max and Chloe’s playful banter, their inside jokes and their gentle ribbing of her. Instead all she had were her thoughts, and the quiet burning jealousy that Max had been able to call Chloe her girlfriend.

Wait, did Kate want to be their girlfriend too?

Her fingers gripped the wheel tighter as she struggled to keep her concentration on the road.  _ There’s no way I can be both their girlfriends. Wouldn’t that be wrong? They’re so perfect together, I don’t want to get in the way of that at all… But I kissed Chloe. That meant something, right? Do I want it to mean something? Oh God, mom would kill me if I started dating Chloe. Or both of them. If we could even do that. But I can’t be gay, I’d lose my congregation and I don’t even want to imagine what my aunt is going to say. _

She sighed as she turned the bend and Blackwell started looming ahead of her. All of that could wait until she had managed to sleep. If she could sleep. _ And how can I be thinking about dating when I just killed Nathan?! _

She pulled herself from her thoughts and carefully maneuvered the rusted behemoth into a parking space before killing the engine, putting it in park and dragging her weary bones from the driver’s seat. She dropped the tailgate and clambered up into the bed to retrieve her and Max’s backpacks. She slung hers over her slender shoulders and carried Max’s in two hands as she started off toward the dorms. She could feel the gun pressing into her back, burning hot as coal as the guilt bubbled back up. 

In self defense, or Chloe’s defense it didn’t matter.

Kate Marsh killed a man.

_ Kate Marsh _ killed  _ Nathan Prescott. _

She couldn’t care less about the noise she made as she pushed through the stairwell doors and onto her floor. She tunnel visioned onto her door, her heavy strides taking her there in a matter of moments. She opened the door, slid her pack off and tucked it against her dresser with a heavy sigh. She quickly reached in and slid out the revolver, opening her underwear drawer and hiding it under everything in the back corner. With the deed completed, she stood again and glanced at Max’s bag.  _ Right, I need to put this back in her room. _

When her hand touched Max’s door handle, and the locked room didn’t give, it all hit her. Reality snapped into focus. Max wasn’t here, Max was in the hospital with Chloe. Chloe could possibly die tonight.

She didn’t know if she collapsed or started crying first. It all happened so fast, she ended up sitting in front of Max’s door, bawling while clutching her ratty old messenger bag.

A light flicked on and a door opened. “Kate?”

Her head jerked up and through the door she could see Victoria looking at her.  _ Oh no, why did it have to be Victoria?!  _ All she could do was nod her head dumbly, the rest of her head too busy with crying. Victoria looked both ways before she took a few swift strides over to her, kneeling down next to Kate. The harsh light of Victoria’s room illuminated the hallway and Kate’s breath caught for a moment.  _ Even in the middle of the night she still looks better than I ever will. _ She shook her head to banish the thought. “Kate, what happened? Why do you have Max’s bag?”

She tried to suck in a few breaths, to calm herself down and allow her lungs to remember how to breathe again. It took a few moments until she managed to blubber out “C-Chloe… I-In-In the… h-hospital.”

Victoria stiffened, her voice a fragile whisper that Kate tried not read too much into. “She’s… In the hospital? Is she hurt?”

Kate nodded stiffly, trying to buy herself time and not blurt out that Victoria’s best friend was a werewolf who had hurt Chloe, and that Kate killed him for it. She tries to remember the lie she told earlier, and forced it through her lips. “H-Hiking acc-accident… She… She fell and her ribs are broken and her lung was punctured and SHE MIGHT DIE!”

Her scream ripped down the hallway and lights started switching on all the way down the hall. More heads poked out of doorways, curious, and Kate could hear them talking in hushed tones. Victoria still knelt next to her, her voice sounding like shattered porcelain “She… what?”

Kate nodded again, biting back the confessions once more. “Y-yeah.”

Another voice sounded next to her, quiet, gentle but full of concern. Kate’s head jerked up and she felt palpable relief when her eyes found Dana. “What’s going on Victoria?”

“I  _ think _ Chloe, Max and Kate were out hiking, Chloe fell, broke her ribs, punctured her lung and she’s in hospital right now. Is that right Kate?”

Kate nodded frantically as another sob wracked her body while her mind flashed back to the image of Chloe laying there, coughing up blood and gurgling. “Holy shit…”

There was more murmuring in the hall as Kate fought to get her breathing under control so she could get away from all the prying eyes. She needed to get into her room and sleep. Victoria’s voice sounded again. “We… should get her into her room. Tay! Can you get everyone to go back inside?”

“Yeah! You heard her! Everyone go back to bed!”

Dana crouched in front of her and gave a little wave. “Can we help you move?”

Kate did her best to nod, too tired to speak. Dana gave her a sad smile before nodding to Victoria and both of them gently guided Kate back to her feet and through her open door. The moment she hit the bed, the incredible fatigue of the day caught up with her and she passed out, the worried murmurs between Dana and Victoria fading away behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cover art by the ever amazing Blu, who you can commission [here.](https://blusthings.tumblr.com/post/624178237972545536/message-me-if-youre-interested-things-i-will)
> 
> Why is this a sequel some of you may be asking, the answer is pretty straight forwards, this is Kate's story. I hope you all enjoy the perspective shift and the chapter, as always, let me know what you think in the comments.
> 
> Aside from that, some housekeeping: I'm not sure if I'll be able to keep up the Saturday schedule for this. I'm really proud of not missing a deadline on Chloe and the Beast, but with my concussion I don't nearly have as much backlog written for this. I'll do what I can, and I can pretty much guarantee that I'll be posting something for at least one fic of mine per weekend, but in terms of this fic, we shall see.


	2. Second Thoughts

Kate’s day started with an agonized groan, her eyes cracking open at the sound of her Sunday morning mass alarm. _Uggggh, I totally forgot about that. I think I got maybe four hours of sleep?_ She turned off the alarm and briefly debated getting out of bed to go to mass. _I definitely need more sleep, maybe I’ll just go to an evening service._

Half awake, she grabbed her phone and checked it for any news. Her mind immediately jumped to worst case scenarios as she pulled up Max’s contact.

It took five rings before an exhausted Max picked up.

“Mmmnhey.”

“Hey Max.”

“Oh! Kate! Sorry, I fell asleep before I could tell you the news. Chloe’s out of surgery.”

“What’s her condition?”

“She’s still in critical, but they’re saying she’s starting to stabilize.”

“That’s good, have you seen her yet?”

“…. I’m not family, Joyce argued with the nurse over it, but they want as few visitors as possible until later today.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s… I hate it but I get it.”

“Maybe you should come back to the dorms to sleep?”

Max sighed. “Yeah, I probably should. They say she won’t wake up for a while if…”

“She will.”

“… Thanks.”

“I’ll get out of bed and come pick you up.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to get more sleep?”

“… I had really bad dreams, so I don’t think I want to right now.”

“Okay, I’ll meet you out front. Text me when you get here.”

Kate rolled out of bed with a grunt, looking down at herself and noticing she was still fully dressed. _Crap, I didn’t even get changed last night._

After getting into some fresh clothes, Kate checked her reflection in a little mirror. Her hair was a complete mess and she clearly wasn’t wearing makeup, not that she cared. She made do with a simple pony tale and her lone baggy hoodie, complete with a spare pair of jeans from Max’s bag. Thankfully Dana had put the backpack in her room when they’d moved her.

_Now where did I leave those keys?_

A quick search of her dorm revealed that she had dropped them next to the dresser where she had hidden the revolver. _I guess I was in a bit of a rush._ _Alright, that’s her keys, my wallet is… in the pack._ She pulled out the wallet and tucked it into the pocket of her hoodie. _Not my usual look, but I’m tired._

She stuffed her feet into slip-ons and walked out into the hallway. _I hope nobody is awake, but generally nobody is._

It took three steps before Victoria’s door creaked open and she poked her head out to peer at Kate. Kate winced in response, pausing to look back at her. _Whoa, her eyes are really red. I wonder if she couldn’t sleep, or if she’s been crying?_ “Uh, hi Victoria.”

“… Hey Kate. Are you… off to church?”

Kate sighed and shook her head. “No, I’m going to pick up Max from the hospital.”

“O-oh. Any news?”

 _Since when does Victoria care? Just the other day she was happily insulting us._ “Chloe is out of surgery. She’s still in critical condition but she’s getting better.”

Victoria nodded slowly, and Kate could see how she tried not to show too much relief at the news. “How are you doing?”

 _I wish I knew. How are you supposed to feel after you kill someone?_ “I’m… tired.”

Victoria nodded again and started to slide back into her room. “… I hope you can sleep after you get Max.”

“Thanks Victoria, I didn’t know you cared.”

She felt bad as soon as the words left her lips, and the way the Victoria recoiled made the feeling even worse. Without another word, the door closed and Kate went on her way to pick up Max, a new wave of guilt clenching her already twisted stomach.

The drive to the hospital was quiet and peaceful, the roads devoid of traffic in the early morning. It all felt so wrong. Chloe was lying in a hospital bed, hovering between life and death, and everything was serene in the dawn light. Kate’s fingers dug into the steering wheel; her jaw clenched. Her world was fractured, her spirit torn, and yet there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. There was no holy judgement descending upon the town from above for someone daring to harm someone she loved.

_Wait, loved?_

_… Oh no, I think I actually love her. Do I actually love her and Max? I can’t bear to part with either of them. I… I don’t have time for this. I need to stay focused on picking up Max._

Kate’s knuckles had turned white around the steering wheel, her teeth grinding together as she fought the feelings down. _They’re a couple. I’m not going to get Max to cheat on Chloe, especially not while she’s_ _i_ _n the hospita_ _l_ _ **.** Maybe that kiss from Chloe was just a one time thing of ‘you’re maybe about to die or worse, so you get to experience this before that’. NO FOCUS ON THE ROAD! _

As she pulled up to the hospital Max was already standing outside, her arms clutching around herself and her head bowed. _Poor thing, hopefully she can sleep._ Max’s head jerked up as Kate approached, a ghost of a smile on her face as she locked eyes with her. Kate barely had time to stop before the door flung open and her ‘friend’ was vaulting into the seat and scooting up next to her with an intensity in her eyes that gave Kate pause. “Hey…”

Max sagged into her, her head resting on Kate’s shoulder. “Hey Kate, I really missed you. Let’s get back to the dorms.”

Kate did her best to keep her composure, despite knowing that Max was all too aware of her spiking heart rate. “I, uh, missed you too Max, you really didn’t like it in there?”

Max nodded emphatically and sighed. “It was hell in there Kate, it’s so loud. All the heart monitors, the intense chemical smells…”

“And they wouldn’t let you see her. I’m so sorry Max, you deserve to be able to.”

Max shrugged as Kate pulled away from the doors. “I haven’t showered in… a while, don’t want to risk infection, right?”

As Kate reached to shift, Max obligingly lifted her head out of the way, only for it to immediately find her shoulder again once she was done. “I guess. Do you want to shower when we get back?”

Max shook her head, and Kate could swear she heard Max breathing deeply as she pressed into her shoulder. “Yeah, then I’m going to crash. That fight was…”

“Something else?”

Max laughed softly. “Yeah, it was. I don’t think I want to know what Rachel did with their bodies.”

Kate couldn’t help but shudder. _And I killed one of them._ “Y-yeah. Hopefully I can actually get some sleep too.”

Max’s tired eyes creased with concern. “Couldn’t sleep?”

Kate shook her head as she came to a stop at a four-way. “Not well. I kept having nightmares about…”

Max just nodded and pressed her head down on Kate’s shoulder, and she felt her face heating up from all the casual contact. Not that it’s unwelcome, but it was so new and she doesn’t quite know how to respond. 

Max broke the silence. “It’s okay, whenever I close my eyes, I just see her like that and…”

Kate wished she could just turn and hold Max, maybe be held by her in turn. “Maybe… we shouldn’t sleep alone? That might help.”

Max let out a tired giggle and her voice had a tone of mischief in it. “Kate, are you asking if you can sleep with me?”

Kate spluttered and had to force herself to stay focused on the road. “N-not like that!”

Max giggled some more and Kate’s face burned hot as she pressed herself into Kate that much more. “Sorry, just teasing. I actually really don’t want to be alone right now.”

Kate tried to force down her blush, or at least appear _slightly_ less red, as she pulled into the Blackwell parking lot. “Okay, we’ll go relax in your room then. I’ll join you after I feed Alice.”

Max reluctantly pulled away from Kate, then paused as she studied her face. “It’s… weird seeing you in that seat.”

“It’s weird _being_ in this seat. Like I’m violating Chloe’s space or something.”

Max smiled softly and placed a comforting hand on Kate’s shoulder. “I think she’ll be proud that you’re taking good care of her truck.”

Kate nodded as she tugged the keys out of the ignition and pushed the door open. “I just hope she wakes up soon.”

The pair hopped out and Kate took care to make sure the truck was locked up. “Same, I can almost hear her teasing us now for sharing a bed.”

Kate tried to imagine the words, the easy carefree tone as Chloe chided her girlfriend for sharing a bed with… whatever Kate was to them. _Will she ever laugh and joke like that with us again?_

The morning was still early, so they were alone, save for the chirping birds, squirrels and Samuel sitting on a bench. The man’s head lifted at their approach and he gave his usual ‘well meaning but slightly unsettling’ smile. “Oh, good morning girls.”

Max mumbled something as Kate stepped forward to talk, despite her own exhaustion. “Good morning Samuel.”

“I’m sorry about what happened to you all. That was a terrible thing.”

Kate froze on the spot, her mind reeling as Max spoke up. “How do you know?”

Samuel shrugged. “The squirrels told me. I do hope your friends will be okay.”

 _WHAT?!_ She fought down the urge to scream at him and demand an actual explanation, but Max tugged her sleeve and Kate followed her gentle guidance, eager to be away from the man who was making her skin crawl.

Mercifully, the dorms were still asleep as Kate left Max to her shower to detour and check on Alice. The bunny thumped around excitedly as Kate gave her some carrot stems, fresh hay and refilled her water. With a sigh of relief she got out of her rumpled day clothes and into some fresh pajamas. Kate quietly kicked herself for not deciding to take a shower as well. She took a few minutes to spend time with Alice, gently petting her through the door of her cage.

A knock came on the door, and when she poked her head out, a freshly showered and pajama clad Max gently pulled her across the hall and into her room. Max shut the door behind them while Kate made herself comfortable on the bed.

A voice in her head freaked out about willingly sleeping in the same bed of the girlfriend of a woman she had kissed not even 24 hours ago. In the end, Kate was too exhausted to pay it too much attention. Sleeping by herself had been a disaster, and those nights cuddled up with the two other women had been the best sleeping she’d ever done. Max crawled into the little twin bed, nestling into Kate’s side and tucking her head under her chin.

The weight was comforting in ways that Kate couldn’t begin to describe and within moments she was lost in a peaceful sleep.

Her evening mass alarm woke them both up, and Max yelped in protest at the shrill sound, Kate scrambling to shut it off. Once her phone was silenced, she took stock of the situation as Max had yet to really move off her. She felt her cheeks burning as Max grumbled in annoyance before settling her head back into Kate’s chest. The voice in her head from earlier was now loud and clear. Chloe was in hospital, and here Kate was cuddling with her girlfriend and that voice was _screaming_ in her mind. _This is wrong, so so so wrong._

But it didn’t feel wrong.

The way Max’s hand was clutching the collar of her shirt, the way her hot breath rolls over her neck and the weight of her body make Kate feel alive in ways she’d scarcely imagined were possible. She’d gotten a taste of those feelings when her lips had met Chloe’s and when she’d spent the night with them before.

But here, now, with Max making little noises in her throat while she shifted around, caused many, many alarm bells to start ringing in Kate’s head. She had only just started to actually accept her feelings for the two, and here Max was, snuggling with her.

She shouldn’t be enjoying this so much. Max and Chloe were a couple, probably the cutest she’d ever seen. They had such a story, so much history between them that it just made her heart sing to see the way they looked at each other. She’d been jealous at first, that her crush had been swept away from her, only to then crush on Chloe as well. But that jealousy had melted away at seeing the bond the two so obviously shared. 

_What if I break them up because of all this?_ The thought turned her veins to ice and she tried to push it down and away. There was no way that Kate could get in between Max and Chloe of all people. She couldn’t do anything to risk damaging such a beautiful connection.

And yet, here she was. With Max half on top of her, making quiet noises in her throat as she just kept on cuddling with Kate like there was absolutely nothing wrong with it. Every rule about proper relationships and conduct she’d ever learned was being broken right now, but she couldn’t bear to do anything about it.

“You okay?”

Kate jolted as she found Max suddenly staring up at her, those water-blue eyes brimming with concern.

“Y-yeah.”

“You sure? Your heart is going crazy.”

She sighed and shook her head. _Fricken werewolves._ “I’m just… nervous I suppose.”

“What about?”

“T-this. Me kissing Chloe. What’s even going on? Why are you so okay with this?”

That earned her a giggle and a ‘I know something you don’t grin’ from Max that made her cheeks explode with warmth. “‘Cause we were going to have a talk about you, after the whole finding who bit me thing.”

The warmth spread from Kate’s cheeks to her chest as she stared. “W-what? What kind of talk?”

“I think Chloe wanted to try something between all of us. Do remember that woman at the garage, Lucy?”

Kate did remember, a woman like that was hard to forget, even if she had been a respectful distance away. She nodded for Max to continue.

“Well she has four wives and she might have put an idea in Chloe’s head.”

“Oh… oh! Wait, you don’t mean…”

“Heh, yeah. I don’t know if it’s her anxiety messing with her about me leaving again, or if it’s about her owing you for saving her life, or maybe she is just really into you. But…”

 _But I almost got her killed and you might never get to have that talk._ The warmth in her chest was throttled by the guilt and anguish that flooded her. 

Max bit down on her lip for a moment, finally shaking her head. “She’ll pull through. She’s too stubborn.”

“I-I’m sure.”

With a soft whine Max gave Kate a small squeeze. “Listen, this is okay. I really don’t want to be alone, and your smell is comforting. Chloe wouldn’t want us to be alone either, I know her. When she’s awake we’ll have that talk and figure things out.”

“Okay…”

Her stomach gave a soft gurgle and Max giggled. “Someone’s hungry.”

“Yeah, I don’t think I’ve eaten since the cabin.”

“Oh shit, Rachel!” Max exclaimed, bolting upright with her eyes as big as saucers. “What are we going to do about Rachel? We just left her there!”

Kate felt ice gripping her heart, they had been so caught up in getting Chloe to safety that they had utterly forgotten about the missing woman. “S-should we go back?”

“No, she’s probably long gone and trying not to be found. Oh no, what if she tells them about Jefferson?”

Max jumped from the bed and started pacing as she tapped her chin. “What about Jefferson?”

“He might have something on me, he knew I was turned.”

Kate’s blood turned to ice as she bolted out of the bed, her eyes locked with Max’s. “Then they’ll figure out we were there and…”

“We have to break into his place and find out what he had before the cops can.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Kate, so much to do, so little time and energy. Figuring out her feelings for Max and Chloe, guilt over Nathan and now breaking and entering to cover up that her crush is a werewolf! What's a girl to do?
> 
> Thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing, and to Kay, [Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluekip) for betaing.


	3. Breaking and Entering

Max and Kate scrambled to get dressed. There was no time for modesty, Kate just threw on some of Max’s clothes before making a quick stop to check that Alice had enough food and water. The pair flew out of the dorms and into the parking lot. Max shouted something to Warren about Chloe as they bolted past.

Max drove this time, which Kate was grateful for. She was still groggy and Max had shown herself to be a much better driver, anyways.

“Do you know where Jefferson lived?”

“With a car like that he’s gotta live near the Pan Estates, so I’m thinking we do what we did to find Rachel again. I get out and sniff around for him while you follow me.”

“Won’t that look a little suspicious?”

“Hmmmm. I guess we could go for a walk, find the place, and then drive there? I dunno, this is way more Chloe’s thing than mine.”

“Chloe breaks into people’s homes?!” Kate gasped, she’d known the girl got up to… less than legal things, but breaking into houses?

“What? No! I just… I think she’d be better at this, she always was better at doing crazy things than I was, I was always just kind of… there.”

“I know what you mean. These past couple days have been crazy and I feel like I’ve just been along for the ride until…” Kate sighed, sagging into her seat as the memories flashed back. The kick of the revolver. The way Nathan had first staggered, then crumpled. The acrid smell of gunpowder. The gurgling sound Chloe had made. Nathan’s pained, accusing eyes staring her down, so full of hatred and agony.

A hand seized her shoulder and Kate recoiled against the door, her head snapping around to stare at Max as she fought down panic. Max spared her a worried glance as she kept driving. “Are you okay? You just kind of trailed off.”

“I, um,” she tried to breathe and held her hands up, watching them tremble. “I don’t think so… I just…”

“Do you want me to pull over?”

“P-Please.”

Kate’s eyes stayed focused on her hands as the truck slowed and stopped. “Fresh air?”

Kate nodded numbly, her hands fumbling with the door for a few moments before she spilled out into the chilly evening air. Max was behind her a few moments later, gently rubbing her back while Kate gulped in breaths. Her body was still seized with the panic of that terrible moment.

“Shhhhh, it’s okay Kate, it’s okay.”

She leaned back into Max’s touch, which quickly turned into Max just holding her and rocking Kate’s heart thundered in her ears.

“It’s gonna be okay Kate. Everything is fine.”

Kate wanted to scream.  _ It’s not okay, how can it be okay? I killed Nathan, and who knows when or if Chloe will wake up. It’s all my fault!  _ Instead she just pressed herself against Max, turning to bury her face into her shoulder.

They stayed like that for awhile, Max still rubbing her back and telling her it was going to be okay, and Kate letting her voice, touch and smell bring her down.

“You good to go?”

Kate wasn’t, she’d rather be curled up in her bed hiding from the world, but they had to do this. It was their last shot at actual answers from the man who had apparently started the whole thing.

Her hands didn’t stop shaking.

  
  


Kate had never actually been to the Pan Estates. They were on the opposite end of town from the little religious sub community she had grown up in. The one she had been too busy to be a sight-see since she started at Blackwell, not that Kate really cared to view it for herself. The whole area was bound to be a place of sin, a shrine to gluttony and greed.

Her first impressions did nothing to dispel those notions. The sign for the neighbourhood was made of large gold letters, with a wide open gate which appeared to be gold plated.

And then there was the houses, oh Lord the houses. They were ugly, opulent things, she could probably fit her family home in some of the garages.  _ Who on earth needs so much space? And why? Some of these houses could fit dozens of people! A camel through the eye of a needle indeed! _

“You okay Kate? Need some more air?” Max asked, voice tinged with concern.

_ Right, she must have heard my heart speed up. _ “I’m fine, it’s just… these houses! Why would anyone need such a thing?!”

“I know, right? I bet most of these people don’t even have kids and it’s just two people who hate each other.”

“Why would you spend your life with someone you hate?! It’s such a mockery of marriage! Do they just need all this space just to avoid each other all the time? It’s just so… so  _ obscene _ ! Think of all the people they could help with all this money, and instead they do this?”

“Whoa there, Kate Marx.” Max teased as she drove. “We’ll probably need Chloe all better before we’re ready to take on capitalism.”

Kate winced but nodded. “Are you re-”

The question died in her throat as she saw the bright orange glow coming from around the next corner. The sounds of sirens met her ears. Max immediately pulled the truck over and the pair hopped out.

Max paused and Kate watched her sniff the air. “This is definitely near where Jefferson lived, which could mean…”

Dread started to seep into Kate as they both piled back into the truck and Max got them back on the road toward the fire.

They couldn’t get close, the police stopped them so they got out and once again Max sniffed before giving Kate a nod.

“What are you two doing here?”

Kate wheeled around to find herself staring at Victoria, who was watching them with a look of hostility. “We, um…”

“I needed to go for a drive and clear my head before we went to go see Chloe.” Max volunteered, stepping forward and putting herself between Kate and Victoria.

“Sure, whatever. Have you two seen Nathan?”

“W-what?” Squeaked Kate, her gut churning at his name. The suspicious way Victoria was looking at them didn’t help.

Victoria just rolled her eyes. “I know you two were busy fucking in Max’s room all day or whatever, but I don’t care. Have. You. Seen. Nathan?”

“No. We were actually sleeping.” Max’s voice was low, almost threatening in a way that made Kate feel warm for reasons she couldn’t place. “So we haven’t seen him. What, did you lose him or something?”

Victoria made a pained expression before she sighed. “Look, I think he’s off his meds and having a fucking bender again, okay? He does it sometimes, but usually he texts me back after like, a day. I’m just… worried.”

More conflicting feelings warred inside Kate. Seeing Victoria show vulnerability was utterly foreign, and it made her want to share the truth. But Kate couldn’t, how does one tell Victoria Chase that her best friend was a werewolf, and now lay dead by her hand?

Thankfully Max spoke up. “We’ll keep an eye out. Do you know whose house is burning?”

Victoria’s face twisted into a grimace. “Mr. Jefferson’s. I just hope he wasn’t in there.”

Kate’s stomach went into free fall, whatever secrets might have been there for them in that house were currently burning, and those that didn’t would no doubt be discovered by the firefighters.  _ I need to stay calm, I can’t let Victoria know anything is wrong. _

“I hope so too.” Max offered, her posture relaxing a little. Victoria’s eyes narrowed as she looked past Max to Kate, then shook her head.

“Whatever, I’m going to go look for Nathan some more.”

“We’ll, uh, keep an eye out.” Kate said, trying and failing to keep her voice from wavering. If Victoria noticed or cared, she didn’t say anything, but she did stare at Kate for a few more moments before walking off in the direction of an expensive-looking jet black car.

Kate didn’t dare to move until she saw the car speed off, only afterward collapsing into Max’s waiting arms.

“Hey, hey we’re okay, she doesn’t know.” Max’s gentle tone soothed her frayed nerves slightly.

“How… how are we going to be able to keep this secret for a whole semester? She’s going to know that something is wrong really soon.” Kate pleaded, her hands gripping Max’s hoodie.

“We’ll figure it out. Maybe Rachel is going to blame Nathan and Jefferson for her kidnapping? I don’t know.”

  
The words were anything but reassuring, and all Kate could do was nod before getting back into the truck. As Max drove she muttered a quick prayer for deliverance and made a mental note that she should  _ really  _ attend mass, or at least go in for confession. If anywhere could help her with the blood on her hands, that was her best bet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing, and to LtDax, [Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluekip) for betaing.
> 
> Welp. There goes that lead.


	4. Late Night Snack

Joyce met them at the hospital entrance. Kate could immediately tell that the poor woman hadn’t slept a wink, she looked utterly haggard and disheveled. Max rushed ahead of Kate to wrap Joyce up in a hug and the two shared words while Kate waited a respectful distance away. Max was Chloe’s girlfriend, Joyce knew her, they deserved their privacy.

She tried to push down how much the thought of her not being involved stung. She had enough to handle without the tantalizing imagery of living in sin with Max and Chloe. The thought alone tempted her.

Pushing back the image didn’t work, but she still kept her distance until Joyce nodded in her direction and Max waved her over.

“I don’t think we were properly introduced, young lady. I’m Joyce, Chloe’s mom.”

Kate mustered the best smile she could, “I'm Kate Marsh. It’s nice to meet you Mrs Madsen.”

“Please honey, just call me Joyce. I can’t say I expected to see you back here, seeing her get hurt must have been awful for you.”

Chloe’s confession about how David physically abused her tugged in the back of Kate’s mind. She pushed down the urge to throw it in Joyce’s face.  _ Not the time, and when did I get so vengeful?! _ “C-Chloe’s my friend, Joyce. Of course I’m here to see her.”

Surprise crossed Joyce’s face. “I can’t say I remember her talking about you. I guess Max is bringing more good things into her life if she’s getting more friends who are actually there for her.”

“I try.” Kate glanced over at Max, who looked pained. “How is Chloe doing?”

“It’s a good thing she’s so damned stubborn. The doctor said that she’s probably out of the woods, but they’re going to be keeping her sedated for a few days to help her heal.”

“That’s really good to hear.”

“Why don’t you go home Joyce and get some rest? We’ll keep an eye on Chloe for a while.” Max offered and Kate sighed with relief internally. Internally Kate felt jumbled, she needed peace and quiet.

“Thank you Max, I made sure that the nurses won’t ask you to leave until Blackwell curfew. Don’t let David catch you two sneaking out, ya hear?”

Max stifled a giggle. “Kate, sneaking out after curfew? That’d be the day.”

“Are you sure she’s friends with  _ my _ Chloe then?”

Kate shot Max a ‘can you please stop’ look before answering. “Yes, she’s been very wonderful.”

Joyce chuckled softly. “Well, she has been perking up since Max came back to her, maybe she’ll even start getting on with David. Anyways, I’d better go. You call me if anything changes, okay Max?”

“Sure thing Joyce, I hope you get a good sleep.” Max said as she attempted a cheery tone, it fell short and sounded hollow to Kate.

“You really are a blessing Max. You two take care.”

With Joyce gone, the two headed into the hospital and up to the room number Joyce had described privately to Max.

Kate had known in the back of her mind that Chloe was in rough shape, but actually seeing her lying there in the hospital bed was another thing entirely. Her heart jumped into her throat and guilt started pooling in its place. Seeing Chloe pale with her eyes sunken, throat intubated, was worse than Kate could have imagined.

Max grabbed her hand and squeezed as a sob escaped her lips.  _ This is my fault. I should have stopped her from walking out through that door, then none of this would have happened. _

Max moved to wrap her arms around her, and Kate had the presence of mind to see the tears spilling down those freckled cheeks. She wrapped her arms around Max and the two held each other as they cried for what felt like the millionth time in the past 48 hours. Kate didn’t even know she had tears left, but they came all the same. If she had been just a little slower, who knows what Nathan would have done to Chloe...

It’s Max who broke the embrace first, pulling away slowly and gently taking Kate’s hands. “It wasn’t your fault, okay? That night was crazy and you saved her. She’s alive right now because of you.”

“I-I…” Kate’s voice died in her throat as Max hugged her close again. The tears stopped and she sagged against Max, turning to rest her head against her chest and listen to the rhythm of her heart. It helped, a little bit.

The pair pulled apart again to face the unconscious Chloe, this time Kate taking Max’s hand and giving it what she hoped was a reassuring squeeze.

Max reached out with her other hand and ran her fingers over Chloe’s forearm. Kate watched her face twist in sadness. Something made Kate feel she was intruding on a private moment between the two of them, that she should leave.

The way Max was returning her squeeze and holding her hand told her otherwise, though. If Max wanted her here, she would be here.

“She was always the invincible one, you know?” Max started, a far away look in her eyes as her thumb stroked over the back of Chloe’s hand. “I was always so anxious and afraid and she just… wasn’t. She acted like she could do anything, solve any problem, beat up any bully. But she never ran off on her own, she’d always go just far enough ahead of me where I could keep up if I pushed myself. I’d see her do it, and then I would feel like I could too.”

Kate had no words to contribute, Max was just venting her feelings.  _ These two are so special together, what am I doing here? _ She just nodded and waited for Max to continue.

“Then I got bitten and  _ I _ started feeling like I could do anything. Last week felt almost magical, finding each other again, then falling for her so hard. But when it really mattered…”

Kate let go of Max’s hand before giving her the biggest hug she could manage. “I-It’s my fault, I should have made her stay in the cabin.”

Max leaned into her hug, wrapping her free arm around Kate’s shoulders. “It wasn’t your fault Kate, it was all so chaotic and we had an awful plan. We should have never turned, just let Chloe shoot them.”

Whatever Kate was about to say was cut off as her stomach gurgled and she flinched at the pain of her hunger. Max pulled back a bit, concern written all over her face. “Right, you never got a chance to eat…”

Exhaustion settled in Kate’s body, showing across her face. To say that she had been running on fumes was putting it mildly. “You haven’t eaten either.”

“Uh, yeah… I guess we can get some food here at the hospital? Here, my dad gave me a credit card to use for emergencies and film. This probably counts.”

Max reached into her messenger bag, pulling out her surprisingly cute animal patterned wallet, and reached into it to pull out a credit card. Kate gingerly took it from her hands, carefully turning over the little plastic card in her hands. Max laughed and gave her a quizzical look. “Everything okay?”

“It’s just… nobody’s given me this kind of trust before. Are you sure this is okay?”

“Totally! I’d trust you over Chloe with my dad’s credit card!” The way Max’s voice lifted from the heavy tone of before and her lips curled into a smile sent a little thrill of delight through Kate’s heart.

“I-I… thank you. That means a lot.”

Max pulled her in for a gentle hug. “Of course I trust you, you’re Kate Marsh. Now go find us some food, I’ll just… be here.”

“If the cafeteria is closed?”

“Wasn’t there a fast food place across the street?”

  
  


The cafeteria was indeed closed for the night, so Kate ended up going to the fast food place. The bored teenager at the cash register gave her a weird look when she placed a huge order all by herself, but she muttered something about a party and they shrugged. She had no idea  _ how _ hungry Max was, but given that she’d seen the girl eat extraordinary amounts of food since being bitten, more was probably a safe bet.

She got a few more weird looks from some of the hospital staff, and a big happy smile from the duty nurse she offered a basket of fries to.

Max was no less appreciative, given her little pleased groans as she wolfed down the greasy burgers and over-salted fries. Kate had never eaten much fast food growing up, but every bite of the greaseball before her felt like heaven itself and while she ate at a slower pace than the resident werewolf girl, she still managed to eat two cheeseburgers and a basket of onion rings to herself.

Max smiled lazily at her as she licked her fingers clean of condiments. “Thank you so much, I had no idea how hungry I was.”

“You’re welcome, oh, hang on, you missed a spot.”

Kate reached out with a napkin and wiped away an errant speckle of mustard from Max’s cheek. Max stared at her for a moment and Kate couldn’t help but notice how her friend’s cheek flushed pale red at the simple act of intimacy.

Their eyes locked for a moment and Kate felt the urge to kiss Max. She fought against it. Chloe was unconscious next to them, severely injured and in an induced coma. Sure they’d shared a kiss, but kissing Max, here and now, was an entirely different matter.

She pulled back, eyes darting away from the entirely too adorable flush on Max’s face as she struggled to think of something to say to bury the tension. Max’s distractingly cute giggle made it worse and Kate felt her own cheeks start to burn.

“I, uh, erm…” Kate stammered, trying to find a way out of the sudden tension.

The giggle intensified into a gentle laugh and Max offered a soft smile. “It’s okay to be nervous, I’m nervous about all this too. When Chloe wakes up we’ll talk about it, the three of us, okay?”

Kate had to fight to swallow down the sudden lump in her throat. “I, uh, okay. But, um, I c-can’t really be…”

“Gay?”

“Y-yeah… my mother, she’d…” Kate fidgeted in her seat as she could hear the awful, awful things her mother would say if she found out that not only was Kate carrying on with  _ a _ girl, but  _ two _ of them.

Max’s tender hand reached out and gently rested on Kate’s shoulder. “One step at a time, okay? We’ll be there to help you if it comes to that.”

“O-okay.”

“Why don’t you sit down? Do you want to be on the other side of Chloe or next to me?”

Kate weighed the options quickly. “I, um, would rather sit next to you.”

“Okay.”

They sat in silence, Max holding both Kate’s and Chloe’s hands as Kate lost herself in thoughts, fighting the old battles she’d fought ever since she’d noticed herself paying far more attention to her girl classmates in  _ that _ way. Despite the war in her mind, the trauma of just two days ago, and Chloe’s condition, sitting there with Max at her side was rather nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing, and to LtDax, [Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluekip) for betaing.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, poor Kate is struggling with so much right now.


	5. Normal is Relative

“Girls? Visiting hours ended an hour ago. I’ll let you stay because of those awesome fries, but you need to leave before the night shift starts.”

The duty nurse’s voice was apologetic but stern. Neither of them was family so staying past visiting hours was not allowed, even though Kate supposed Max and Chloe marrying was just a matter of when, not if. She hated that the idea made her jealous and happy in equal measure. Of course she wanted to see them standing before the altar together, but that she couldn’t join them stung.

_ Whoa, okay, why am I thinking about getting married to them? What is even happening?! _

“Kate?” Max’s voice was gentle as she stood up. “We really should head back to the dorms, there’s classes in the morning.”

“I, uh, right. Sorry.” Kate also got to her feet, casting a tired, last glance over her shoulder at Chloe before following Max out the door.  _ There’s so much going on right now, school is probably the last thing I need to think about right now. I wish I could just lock myself in my room for a few days and really reflect about everything. I should go to confession and be absolved of my sins. I’m sure the fathers at the congregation will understand, I just… need to talk to one of them. Maybe tomorrow, after class. _

Max gently guided her through the hospital as she got lost in thought about what scripture might have to say about any of this. Unfortunately, the Church didn’t exactly have a how-to guide on dealing with werewolves.

Gay feelings were an entirely different matter. She was definitely going to have to do more research about that. She could ask around in some online forums with queer people of faith, asking for guidance about what she should do.

Part of her realized that by doing that, she was already breaking the rules. That nagging voice in her head that sounded like her mother scolding her was chiding about daring to find ways to reconcile her faith with how she felt. Her mother would say that following the rules was the most important thing and that Kate was straying from the path.

Kate hated that voice, but making it shut up was always hard. Being around Max had always helped, but now it had started making the voice worse.

She pulled herself into the passenger side of Chloe’s truck.  _ When are we going to have to bring this back to her house? Or fill up the tank? _

Max paused as she put in the key, then leaned down and reached for something on the floor. Kate’s eyes followed her hand and found Chloe’s beanie laying there discarded. Max picked it up and turned it over in her hands. “I guess it fell off when we were getting her down…”

“I’m amazed it stayed on until then.” Kate said, her voice trailing off as her hands started shaking again.

_ Don’t think about it. Don’t think about it. Don- _

Max’s hand rested on her shoulder. “Are you okay? You’re trembling.”

“Y-yeah,” Kate lied, “I’m just cold.”

Max’s gentle eyes lingered on her for a few moments before she relented. “Alright.”

Kate closed her eyes and tried to picture anything other than that night, but she couldn’t escape it. Chloe’s body sailing through the air like a discarded toy, the glint of the revolver as it was thrown through the moonlight; How it landed at her feet and the weight of the pistol in her unsteady grip just before she...

The engine roared to life and jerked Kate out of her memories. She looked over at Max, who was now wearing Chloe’s beanie. Max caught her gaze and shrugged. “It smells like her.”

“O-okay.”

“Did you want to stay with me again tonight?” Max asked with a tinge of hope in her voice.

Kate wanted to, she really did, but Victoria seeing them that evening already had her on edge. Starting a normal school day by coming out of Max's room, in full view of everyone? “I-I think we should try and be on our own tonight, if that’s alright?”

“Okay.” Max agreed.

  
  
  


Kate sat on the edge of her bed, hands still trembling slightly as she watched Alice going about her usual routine. Her room was normally a welcome island of calm in the rough seas of high school. This was her sanctuary against the maelstrom that was without and within. Here was where she used to feel safe. Here was where Kate could think through the insane thoughts she had about Max and how much she dreaded hearing her mother’s voice within these walls without being paralyzed by fear.

Now she just felt lonely.

As insane as it had all been, for the past few days she’d spend nearly every waking hour that wasn’t in class alongside Max and Chloe. It had felt… special. Right, even. Which was insane because Kate Beverly Marsh wasn’t supposed to be gay, and she certainly wasn’t supposed to be anything other than monogamous.

Then again, werewolves weren’t supposed to exist, and she’d seen four of them.

Her head hit her pillow as she stared up at the ceiling. A tiny voice in her head told her that she should probably get into pajamas and get ready to end the day. She had class tomorrow.

_ Class. It used to seem so important… now it just doesn’t. Like, who cares what grades I get? I just watched someone I… really care about nearly getting killed by a monster that isn’t supposed to exist, and the other girl I really care about is also a ‘monster’. _

_ What even is anything anymore? _

Her eyes wandered over the ceiling stucco, trying to lose herself in the random geometry to escape her thoughts for a few moments. Normally she would be doodling to keep her mind busy, but her hands could not stop shaking.

A gentle knock came from her door and she sat up.  _ Who’s here this late on a Sunday? _

She got up out of bed and quickly stepped over to the door, finding Dana’s friendly face when she opened it. “Oh, hey Dana.”

Dana’s normally sparkling, friendly smile faltered for a moment. “Uh, hey Kate. Why are you in Max’s clothes?”

Kate glanced down at herself and her eyes went wide when she realized she was, indeed, still wearing Max’s borrowed clothes. Her face suddenly got a lot warmer. “I-uh…”

“Hey, I’m not going to judge, you don’t have to say ‘it’s not what it looks like’,” Dana’s voice was surprisingly sweet.

Kate just nodded instead of trying to stammer out a response.

“Can I come in?”

“I, uh, sure…” Kate stepped back from the door as Dana let herself in.

“I brought your book back, thanks for letting me borrow it. I can’t believe I lost mine.”

Kate’s eyes landed on her copy of The October Country as Dana held it out to her. It seemed like a lifetime ago when she’d let Dana borrow it to get her book report done, had only been a week? “You’re welcome, it wasn’t a problem.”

Dana flashed her a warm smile as she took the book back. “Do you want to talk?”

There were so many things that Kate wanted to blurt out at that moment, she did need someone to talk to about everything. There was so much she needed to spill out, but she doubted Dana would be able to understand what had happened. She might understand things with Max and Chloe, though.

“Um, sure. Have a seat, I can make some tea if you want.”

“No thanks, I’m good,” Dana said as she sat down, “do you wanna to talk about the whole, you know,” she gestured to Kate’s borrowed clothes, “situation?”

Kate felt her cheeks burning as she took a spot on her bed beside Dana.

“I won’t tell anyone, okay?”

Kate bit her lower lip before nodding, her face felt like it was aflame. “S-sure.”

“So what’s going on with you three?”

“I… don’t really know,” Kate confessed, her hands fretting with the drawstrings of Max’s hoodie. “It’s all so...so confusing and sudden. I-I just don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing anymore.”

“Are the three of you, like, a thing?” Dana asked, her brow furrowed in what Kate could only assume was worry.

“I-I don’t know, maybe? Max said her and Chloe had agreed to talk about it, but then, you know…”

“How do you feel about it?”

Kate paused for a moment, trying to actually order the insane chaos that were her feelings about the pair. “I-its… overwhelming. I-I’m still not sure about liking girls like… that, but the two of them?”

“I mean, didn’t you kind of have a thing for Max?”

Kate’s jaw dropped. “I-I… how did you know?”

Dana snorted, her face drawn into an amused smirk. “Girl, you two were so obvious! You used to give her puppy dog eyes at lunch all the time, and she talked all soft and gentle with you. Juliet and I had a bet on whether you two would end up dating before or after the winter break.”

“G-guess you both lost that.” Kate drew her knees up to her face, trying to hide her massive blush.

“Chloe always was a wild card.” Dana nodded thoughtfully, “I had no idea those two even knew each other.”

“Neither did I…”

“And how do you feel about Chloe?”

Words eluded Kate as she tried to figure out the actual answer to that question. “She’s… it’s crazy. I just feel so alive when I’m with her, like I’ve had way too much black tea but without the buzzing behind my eyes. It’s… she’s electrifying. I just get swept up in everything and feel like I can do anything when she’s around.”

Dana smirked. “Sounds like you’ve got it bad girl.”

“Wait wait wait, no! Dana, you don’t understand. I  _ can’t _ .” Kate buried her face in her hands, despair starting to seep it’s icy touch into her veins.

“I know your mom is strict and everything, but you feel what you feel.”

“My mom would kill me if she knew I liked even one girl,” Kate groaned, “but two?! Dana, she might try and  _ disown me _ .”

Dana’s eyebrows shot up. “Is she really that bad? I don’t think you’ve really talked about her much.”

“She goes beyond what the church dictates, everyone in the family has to fit her ‘perfect family’,” Kate could feel wetness start rolling down her cheeks. “Or we’re dirt. I’m the oldest so I have to be the  _ example _ . I  _ have _ to be  _ perfect _ . Probably the only reason she lets me play the violin is because it makes me look good.”

“Whoa, I’m so sorry Kate.” Dana stared at her, eyes wide.

Kate wiped her tears off in her sleeve. “It’s fine… I… I just normally talk to Stella about these things, sorry to just dump this all on you.”

“It’s okay. Living with your family sounds crazy rough, if there’s anything I can do, let me know.”

“You could stop whatever rumours Vic is going to start spreading about me borrowing Max’s clothing. I really don’t need  _ that  _ getting back to my mother. Just say that I forgot to do my laundry or something…”

“What actually happened?” Dana’s voice was soft, delicate even. “I’m not going to judge you.”

“Max just didn’t want to be alone the night after we got back from the hospital, and I had an awful sleep because I just kept seeing Chloe getting hurt in my nightmares.”

“So you just fell asleep together?”

Kate fidgeted some more with the drawstrings of Max’s hoodie, exhaustion starting to creep it’s way into her. “Yeah, and we overslept, so we had to scramble to meet Chloe’s mom and I just threw her clothes on.”

“Makes sense. I’ll try and talk Vic out of doing anything, but she’s probably too busy looking for Nathan right now to care.”

Kate did her best not freeze up at the name.

With a yawn, Dana stood back up and stretched. “Well, I’ll get out of your hair. I’ll see you in class tomorrow, okay?”

“Sounds good.” Kate tried to say with more brightness than she felt.  _ I’m definitely going to have to talk to Stella about all of this tomorrow. _

With Dana gone, Kate finally got out of Max’s borrowed clothes. Not that she wanted to. They smelled like Max, a gentle scent of pine and vanilla. Much like the woman they belonged to, they made Kate feel at peace.

She opted to get into pajamas and zipped Max’s hoodie up around her spare pillow. She tried not to think too hard about how nice and comfortable it was to nestle up with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing, and to LtDax, [Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluekip) for betaing.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading and please, let me know what you think in the comments!


	6. No Rest

Earlier in her life, Kate had been happy to greet each morning with a cheerful enthusiasm for each new day. Her parents were not nearly as excited about the sun rising, especially after being woken up about it by their young daughter.

Kate had quickly learnt to keep that enthusiasm to herself, filling the lonely hours before her sisters and parents woke with her own drawing. Her exuberance for the sunrise transitioned to an appreciation for quiet time alone, filled only with the sounds of songbirds and her pencil scratching the page.

However, this morning was met with dread.

She had to return to class.

Kate Marsh had never played hookie in her entire life. She had only missed school when she was so sick she couldn’t get out of bed. But, in the early dawn hours before her alarm went off and she had to open her eyes to face the new day, the thought tempted her.

_Chloe is definitely a bad influence on me._

Her alarm eventually sounded and she begrudgingly opened her eyes. Her head rolled over to look at Alice, who was sitting in her cage and chewing hay. “Good morning bunny, guess I’ve got to take care of you, huh?”

Alice’s response was to chew on some more hay.

“I’ll get you fresh water then change your food. I think I can manage that much.”

Alice continued to munch.

Kate groaned as she pulled herself up into a sitting position, yawning as she looked around her room.

_I really don’t want to get out of bed today, but I guess I have to._

She looked down at Max’s borrowed hoodie-turned-pillowcase. _Oh, darn it, I drooled on it! Maybe that wasn’t the best idea, but it’s as close as I can get to spending the night with her again and not have anyone get ideas. Maybe I should give her something of mine...would that help her?_

There was a gentle rattling of metal on metal and Kate’s attention jerked up to Alice moving around in her cage, giving her an almost expectant look.

“Alright, alright, I’m getting up.”

With reluctance, her feet swung out from under the covers and pressed into the cold ground of her dorm. It took her another few moments to muster the energy to push herself out of bed and onto her feet.

The automatic routine for taking care of Alice kicked back in, her autopilot going through the motions of changing out her food and taking the water bottle off the cage for refilling. _I need to clean it out today, refresh everything for her._

After she was finished filling the food, Kate continued by gathering up the things she’d need for her shower along with Alice’s water bottle.

_I should probably return Max’s clothes before people start waking up. I wonder if she’s awake? Oh, I hope my alarm didn’t wake her up, she did say that the sound proofing didn’t block everything out._

_Oh no._ Kate thought as her heart went into free fall. _She must have heard me talking to Dana last night. I definitely need to talk to her, I hope I didn’t make her feel bad or anything._

With everything other than the borrowed hoodie tucked under her arm, Kate poked her head out into the hall. It was deserted at this hour. Kate was by far the earliest riser on campus, the next person to wake up was usually Stella, which was when they would normally spend time together. _So many people to talk to and I just do not have the energy for all of it. I really, really want to talk about everything with Stella, but I should see if Max is awake first and make sure she doesn’t feel hurt if she did overhear._

With Kate’s mind made up, she quietly padded across the hall and tapped her knuckles on Max’s door. The sound echoed down otherwise eerily silent halls. Kate noticed, with annoyance, that her hand was trembling again.

The silence crept on and Kate did her best not to hold her breath _. I guess she must still be asleep?_

Just then the door handle made a click and opened to show Max’s face. She looked haggard and tired, with her hair an adorable mess of bedhead. “Uh, hey Kate.”

 _She looks a little freaked out, that’s not good._ “Hey Max, can I come in? I brought your clothes.”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” Max’s voice was scratchy and somber, her eyes downcast, as she opened her door wide enough to let Kate in.

Kate stepped in and gently put the bundle of clothes on Max’s couch before turning to face her. Max yawned and rubbed her eyes.

“Did you sleep okay?” Kate gently asked.

“Not really. You?”

“I… slept okay.”

“That’s good.” Max said with a gentle nod.

 _I guess I need to just say it then._ “Did you hear Dana and I talking last night?”

“Yeah…” She admitted, her shoulders sagging. “Look, Kate, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know that we might get you into so much trouble. We can stop everything and just be friends, if you want.”

There had been moments in Kate’s life where she had crossed a line without knowing it, and her mother had made her sorely regret it. After that, there had been many, many times where she’d seen the line in front of her and shied away to protect the family image, to keep her mother happy.

Now there was a big, fat red line staring her in the face. It had been staring her in the face since she’d met Max, only to grow larger and larger the longer she stared at it. It had bloomed bigger still when Chloe’s impossibly pretty and dashing face had entered her world, bringing chaos and wonder in her wake.

But here, in this moment, with Max’s hopeful face twisted with guilty concern, stepping past it was as easy as breathing. “I’m not going to abandon you. Either of you. I care about you both and I’m not about to stop.”

“Oh, Kate.” Max’s voice brimmed with emotion as she crossed the short distance between the two of them, her arms wrapping around Kate and tugging her into a tight embrace. Kate did her best to return it, but matching Max’s newfound strength was definitely not in the cards.

“What about your mom?” Max asked, not pulling away.

“I… um. I don’t really know.”

Max gave her a little squeeze before backing away. “Well you won’t be alone, okay?”

“Thank you.”

“Any time.” Max flashed Kate a soft smile before stifling another yawn. In the dawn light, with her friend’s form not covered in loose jeans and a baggy hoodie (or covering her eyes to avoid looking at her nude before she turned), Kate got a real look at just how much Max had changed.

Where once Max had been lean to the point of Kate worrying the woman wasn’t eating enough, now there was toned muscle. Where before Max had moved with a fumbling awkwardness, tucked into herself out of anxiety, she now moved fluidly with purpose and a sense of control.

Kate felt heat bloom in her chest at the spectacle.

“I, um, I’m going to go take my shower, alright? I’ll see you in class.”

“Sure, and we’ll go see Chloe afterwards, right?”

“Of course.”

Shower thoughts are dangerous things. As Kate went through the laborious process of lathering up her hair, it finally hit her what she had just done. _I committed to whatever is going on between the three of us. Oh Lord!_

Her mother’s face loomed large in her mind. She saw the way her mother’s nose wrinkled up when she was mad, those utterly piercing eyes bearing down on Kate. Then that voice! That wretched tone that tore her apart with an ease absent of mercy.

 _Kate Beverly Marsh! Just what do_ you _think you’re doing?!_ The voice screeched in her thoughts. _Not only was living in sin with one woman was not enough for you, but two?! Some bashful harlot and a blue haired, tattooed tramp no less!_ Kate’s chest heaved as she gasped for breath. She knew she was crying just imagining the confrontation, but her chest felt too tight, her head spinning as she tried in vain to fight the words. _You bring such shame to our family! To think that my eldest daughter would be such a failure! I always knew you were wicked, but you’re dragging us all down with your wicked ways!_

Kate leaned into the side of the shower stall, panting for breath as the hot water battered her body. _Come on, you’re not alone, they’ve got your back. I wish Chloe were here, I feel like she’d give me the strength to deal with this._

_I need to talk to Stella later, she’ll be able to give me some advice._

“You’re _what_?!” Stella stared at her, eyes wide and voice incredulous.

“I’m… pretty sure I’m gay.” Kate admitted. The words still felt crazy coming out of her mouth.

There was a quiet pap as Stella’s palm met her forehead. “I _knew_ that. But Max _and_ Chloe?!”

“Shhhhhh, not so loud.” She pleaded, her hands clasped together.

“Yeah, yeah, just… Jesus Kate, maybe Max would have been doable, but _Chloe_?”

“How do you know her?” Kate’s eyebrow raised.

Stella just rolled her eyes. “This town isn’t _that_ big. Besides, I know her through Frank.”

“R-right.” She winced internally. Stella was so small and unassuming it was easy to forget how she was keeping herself in Blackwell without a scholarship. Not that Kate judged, Stella didn’t have much of a choice.

“To be totally honest, I’m amazed she even noticed you. I know there’s some history between her and Max, but she was dating Rachel fucking Amber! Now she’s into you?”

Kate felt her cheeks flushing at the idea of someone who had been dating the former queen of the school being interested in her. There was so much about the situation. Kate decided she would have to consider them after she finished working out her feelings. “It’s… complicated.” 

Stella opened her mouth to respond, but both of their phones chimed. “The fuck?”

Kate watched her friend’s face go from confusion to concern. “Dear Blackwell students,” she read aloud, “we regret to inform you that your esteemed professor, Mark Jefferson, has tragically passed away due to a house fire last night. Until further notice, all photography classes are cancelled and counselling will be available for students on request. _What the fuck?!_ ”

Kate had to remember to take a breath as Stella stared at her, eyes wide in shock. “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me! What the shit am I going to do now?!”

“I-I… um…” Kate felt her hands shaking as her mind conjured up images of that horrible night. _I saw Rachel maul Jefferson, she looked like she was about to kill him. How on Earth did he die yesterday in his own home from that fire?_

“Whoa, you’re, like, really pale Kate.” Stella edged closer, suddenly concerned, their previous conversation all but forgotten.

Kate’s mouth opened and shut a few times, but words didn’t come out. If they did she would end up confessing what had happened. The dam inside of her was cracking. Kate had never been one to keep secrets, her mother had made sure of that.

“Dude, you’re trembling.”

Kate looked down at her shaking hands and squeezed her eyes shut, willing them to be still. It didn’t work. She felt her friend’s slim arms wrap around and hold her.

The tears refused to wait and flooded Kate’s cheeks. She didn’t have to tell Stella why she was crying, but at least she could cry. She clutched Stella as she wept, all the guilt, pain and strangeness spilling out in an unstoppable torrent. To her credit, she felt Stella crying with her. She’d known Stella had been somewhat close to Jefferson, and once that knowledge had filled her with hope that her friend was finding a path to freedom, now it filled her with dread that Jefferson had been preparing her to join his ‘pack’.

 _Everything I knew was so wrong… maybe my feelings for Max and Chloe aren’t so crazy considering that there are_ werewolves _running about. Mr. Jefferson was one of them, and seemed to be trying to get the girls in the class ready to… ‘join’ him._

Kate sagged deeper into Stella’s embrace as the tears kept on. _I don’t know how I still have tears left after this weekend, but they keep coming._

It was Stella who pulled back first, reaching for a box of tissues on her side table. She offered one to Kate, who took it gratefully. The two women wiped away their tears, blew their noses and then just absently stared at one another.

_I wish I could tell her the truth so she wouldn’t be so torn up about this._

“Fuck.” Stella groaned. “I’m so fucked. Mark had been helping me so fucking much, there’s no way I’ll be able to get out of here without his help.”

Kate felt her throat burning as she watched her friend be swallowed by despair. She knew how bad Stella’s home life was, and how desperate she was to escape. _She’d have joined Jefferson out of desperation, oh my Lord. We saved her from him and I can’t even tell her about it._ “I-I’m sorry.”

With a sigh, Stella walked back to her bed and lay down. “It’s fine. I’ll figure it out. I’m getting out of here, one way or another. Good luck with your… whatever the fuck you’ve got going on with those two.”

_I guess I’ll have to do this without her help._

Kate nodded, taking her cue to leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing, and to LtDax, [Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluekip) for betaing.
> 
> As always let me know what you think in the comments!


	7. For the Wicked

Kate expected classes to be a muted affair, quiet and subdued with the news of Jefferson’s demise. What she hadn’t expected was for the quiet to grate on her nerves. Her senses treated every sensation like it was important, that she had to pay attention to everything lest she miss something vital. It was overwhelming having to keep the rising sense of danger at bay.

By lunchtime her nerves were shot. Her fork gently rattled against her plate as she stared at her half eaten food. No matter how hard she tried, she could not get herself to calm down as the sounds of those around her drove her crazy.

Suddenly, Max’s hand was on hers, and those soulful eyes looked at her with concern. “Stressed?”

Kate nodded.

“It’s cool Kate, everyone’s messed up about it,” chimed in Warren from his seat next to her. Even without his usually cheerful tone, he was entirely too loud.

Kate’s eyes flicked from him then back to Max. Their gazes met, a little quiet moment to share the irony.

“Yeah, but Kate and Max care more than most people.” Said Alyssa, with a nod. She tried to draw in a deep breath to centre herself, but it came in shakey. Her muscles tensed up as her irritation grew. 

Warren’s fork hit the plate with unnecessary force, his lips smacking as his chewing drowned out her thoughts. She gritted her teeth against the rising irritation.  _ This isn’t like me, what’s going on? _

The sounds of metal hitting concrete and smashing porcelain rang out across the cafeteria as someone behind her dropped their tray and a plate broke. Something in Kate broke alongside it and she surged to her feet, consumed with a need to get away. Someone probably called after her as she forced herself not to run from the cafeteria. Her body  _ screamed _ at her to get out, that she needed to leave. Her chest was a cauldron of stress and her muscles ached to bolt.

She smelled the acrid stench of gunpowder as she burst from the doors. She could feel the kicking of the revolver as if it were still in her hand.

She crashed through the doors to the girl’s bathroom, turned the sink on and desperately splashed cold water over her face.  _ Come on Kate! Get a grip! _

She gripped the sides of the sink, her chest heaving as stress churned her gut and threatened to expel what little lunch she had eaten.

The door banged open and she turned to see Max just before she was embraced in a bear hug. She sagged into it, wrapping her arms around her. They stayed like that for a few moments as Kate felt herself slowly calming down. The smell of weed and cigarettes coming from Chloe’s beanie was a welcome addition to Max’s usual scent.

“I… think I’m really messed up.” Kate managed to say after a few moments.

“Your heart has been going crazy all day.” 

Kate leaned heavily against the sink and sighed. “I guess I’ve been getting more and more wound up. The quiet has been driving me nuts.”

“Feeling like something is really off?”

“Y-yeah.”

“I know what you mean. I keep hearing all these people talking about what a great man he was and how big of a loss it is…”

“And it’s all a lie.” Kate finished.

“Exactly.”

“Can we, um, go back to my dorm? I think seeing Alice would really help me.”

With a nod, Max started walking to the bathroom door. Kate followed close as they went back into the hall and right into Victoria.  _ Just walk past, just walk past, ju- _

“ _ Really _ smallfield? A quicky in the bathroom with miss Abstinence Club while you’re wearing Chloe’s stupid hat?”

Kate froze up despite herself, unable to meet Victoria’s glare lest she somehow drag her secrets out. “W-what? We didn’t…”

“Oh please. Chloe’s in the hospital and you’re already fucking around behind her back.”

“Shut. Up.” Max snarled, her fists clenching. Kate could vaguely see Max’s muscles tense beneath her hoodie.

“Why should I? You’re the one cheating on her girlfriend of, what, five fucking days?” Victoria leaned in, her face twisting in a sneer.

“I would never do something like that!” Kate protested.

“Spare me. I saw you wearing Max’s shitty excuse for clothes yesterday. Miss me with Dana’s bullshit about you being out of laundry.”

“Fuck off.” Max snarled again, and Kate thought she could hear a faint growl. “You  _ know _ that’s not Kate, and that’s not what happened.”

Victoria rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “Oh please. I’m sure Chloe is going to just  _ love _ to hear all about your side action.”

Kate saw Max momentarily stiffen. “Leave Kate out of your jealous bullshit.”

Victoria’s face turned several deepening shades of red before settling on a bright crimson. “I don’t know  _ what _ you’re talking about.”

“It just burns you up that she’d rather hang out with us than you, and that you never had a chance with her.”

Kate reached out and gave Max’s sleeve a gentle tug as she tried to fight the rising sense of panic. “Come on Max, let’s just go.”

“Oh as fucking if! You wouldn’t have a chance with her if that whore Amber hadn’t run off.”

“I guess you  _ really _ don’t know Chloe then, huh bitch?”

Kate tugged on Max’s sleeve some more. “Max,  _ please _ .”

“Yeah Max, fucking run off with your side piece.” Victoria’s face was a mask of pure rage and every fibre in Kate’s being just wanted to be  _ away _ . She was already wound up enough with having to deal with an angry Victoria.

“Envy’s a good look on you Vic.” Max spat as she stalked off and Kate followed close behind her.

When Kate stepped into her dorm she felt her stress start to ebb away. Her shoulders dropped and her breath escaped in a loud sigh as she walked over to Alice’s cage. The rabbit thumped over to the cage door. Kate scooped her out and held the rabbit in her arms, just gently stroking her fur. Her stress bled away with each gentle pat.

“Did you put my sweater on your pillow?”

Kate’s cheeks immediately started burning as she turned. “I-I… yes.”

“I did the same thing with Chloe’s beanie… maybe I could borrow something from you?”

That did  _ not _ make Kate’s cheeks feel any less warm. “I… um, sure, if you really want you could borrow a cardigan.”

“Thanks! It’s not as good as actually cuddling with you, but it’ll help a lot.” Max’s face turned into a huge cheerful smile that transported Kate back to earlier days when they were just two young women sitting down for tea and totally not slowly falling in love with each other.

“Yeah. Sorry, I just…”

“You can’t let it get back to your mom, I know.”

“I’m sorry,” Kate sighed, “I’m not going to abandon you two, not after everything that’s happened, but I’m not strong enough to face  _ that _ yet.”

“It’s okay, we still gotta talk everything out anyways. But having something from each of you  _ would _ be nice.”

“I still can’t believe you two are even thinking about that, w-with me. I just…” Alice started wriggling in Kate’s arms, interrupting her train of thought and she set the rabbit down on the floor.

“It’s crazy.”

“It hasn’t even been a week since I found out about your… changes.” Kate said as she sat heavily on the couch, head in her hands.

“That’s definitely one word for it.”

“It’s all been too much, too fast. The past five days have felt like months.”

Max’s gently placed a hand on Kate’s shoulder and she gave a small whimper before leaning into the very welcome contact. “I know what you mean. A week ago I was… just regular old Max Caulfield, anxious dork extraordinaire. ”

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to compare myself to you!” Kate winced. However, there was no anger in that gentle gaze.

“It’s okay,” Max reassured, her voice that special, calming tone that Kate had only ever heard used with her. It soothed her soul and made Kate’s heart melt. “It’s been so crazy for all of us. I can do so many things now that I never even dreamed before. The wolf is there, yeah, but I’m still me. Just…with a bit more.”

Kate shuffled closer and Max’s arm wrapped around her shoulders. Her heart started pounding as she realized how easy it would be to just lean in and… kiss Max.  _ I shouldn’t, I really shouldn’t. But I shouldn’t have said I would be there for them today, I shouldn’t have tried to talk to Stella about this. I shouldn’t even be having these thoughts. But I am, and I did, and it feels like the only sane part out of any of this. _ “Did you…feel anything for me before all of this?”

“I think so. I’ve never really been good figuring out how I feel. Chloe was pretty easy because we’d known each other for so long and when I moved I’d just started to understand that maybe there was something there. Seeing her again just made it all click into place. But you? Before I changed I thought you were special, somehow, but I couldn’t put my finger on why.”

“And now?” Kate asked, daring to let herself hope.

“Now I know you’re special. You stepped up when no one else would have. You’ve stood by us when things got hard. Nobody would have blamed you for leaving before Nathan and Jefferson showed up, but you didn’t and never asked for anything in return.”

“That’s not entirely true.” Kate mumbled, her cheeks flushing hot at the memory of Chloe’s rough, chapped lips pressing into her own.

Max giggled softly as she nodded. “True, you did kiss Chloe.”

“Did… um, that make you jealous?” It felt like her heart was thudding hard enough to burst from her chest.  _ Her face is so close, oh Lord have mercy on me. _

“I mean, a little bit. I totally expected us to kiss you and Chloe, but I’m not upset that it happened or anything. It was actually really cute.” The twinkle of mirth in Max’s eyes warmed Kate’s cheeks.

_ There’s no way she doesn’t know how worked up about this I am. Werewolves are really not fair. _

Kate’s eyes flicked down to Max’s lips. There had been times during their tea dates where she’d lost herself for a moment in wondering what they might feel like. She would think how unassuming they were, and what would happen if she were to lean in and lay a delicate kiss against them. Then, as soon as she’d caught the thought, she’d force herself away from the mental image lest her mother’s voice rear its ugly head.

She’d fought for so long against the label she wanted to attach to her feelings. The feelings that made her want to sketch Max day after day, that made her want to compose songs for her on her violin. It was those feelings that made Kate want to push past the life her mother had built for her and find out what  _ she _ wanted for a change.

Then Chloe had shown up and forced her to actually confront how she felt. Not only about Max, but about women in general. Chloe was exactly the kind of person her mother had insisted that she should stay away from with her dyed hair, swearing, drugs, alcohol, tattoos, smoking, and being gay. She was the whole sinful package really, and being around her was always exhilarating and terrifying in the best way. Like she was at the apex of the first hill on a roller-coaster just before gravity took hold and did the rest.

Except she wasn’t on the apex anymore. Gravity already had it’s hold and she was hurtling forwards into the unknown. She’d crossed so many lines already. She’d kissed Chloe. She’d committed herself to standing by Max and Chloe through whatever happened. She’d killed Nathan for Christ’s sake, even if he was a werewolf and about to kill Chloe.

What was one more line, really?

Max’s lips were every bit as soft and gentle as she’d imagined as she pressed the kiss home. She’d expected Max to flinch or something, but instead a tender hand brushed over her cheek as Max held it to keep Kate close. If Chloe had gotten a kiss, it was only fair that Max got one as well.

And if this was going to be her only time kissing Max until Chloe woke up, well she wasn’t about to squander the opportunity. All’s fair in love after all. If Chloe got her first kiss, it was only fair that Max got her first make out.

Kate was overwhelmed with rapturous bliss as she finally stopped fighting and gave into her heart’s desires. Unfettered at last, even if it was just for this insane moment, she deepened the kiss, pressing herself into Max. There was a small, happy sound in Max’s throat as she responded in kind.

Kate had never felt so warm in her life and she fumbled to get her cardigan off without breaking the kiss. Max’s hands fumbled to help her and they kept their lips locked together. With the accursed garment removed Kate felt her need to be closer to Max rising. First she pressed her body against Max, but that wasn’t enough. She needed more. Still not daring to part lips, Kate lifted a leg and moved herself into Max’s lap, her hands grabbing Max’s shirt as pressed herself in harder.

She didn’t want to stop, it was all too intoxicating. Her mind buzzed with happiness and her whole body ached with the sheer joy of it.

Her lungs also burned for air, but that was a minor detail.

Eventually that burning in her lungs demanded that the kiss end and she pulled back to suck in fresh air. They were both left panting, Max with an awestruck look on her face, cheeks flushed red in a way that just tickled Kate’s heart.

“Wowsers…”

At first Kate snorted, then she giggled, until finally she came to a full on laughing fit. Max kept her steady in her lap as Kate howled with laughter, both at Max’s adorkable exclamation, and the sheer joy and wonder within her. She laughed until tears rolled down her cheeks and her sides ached.

Suddenly all the fear and pain she had felt was just so  _ silly _ . How could anything that made her feel so joyous and wonderful be wrong in the eyes of God? Surely this was what He meant by heaven on earth. Between Max and Chloe all she felt was sheer happiness, it all felt so  _ right _ . If God had a plan, surely this was His plan for her. 

When the laughter finally released her, Kate collapsed on top of Max, still giggling softly.

“You okay? That was…”

After a deep breath to try and centre herself, Kate nodded through her endorphin haze. “Crazy and wonderful? Yes. My mother is going to kill me if she ever finds out, but you know what?”

“What?” Max tilted her head, her face a strange mix of amusement and concern.

“I’d die a happy woman.”

A giggle burst out of Max. “Oh my god, you’re both such romantics!”

The warmth in Kate’s cheeks returned in full force. “I suppose so! I hope Chloe won’t get jealous or anything.”

“Nah, she’ll just get competitive about it.” Max’s voice was so gentle and warm, her eyes glittering with mirth. Kate just wanted to kiss her again and lose the rest of the lunch break in her arms.

Her phone started buzzing to signal the end of their lunch before she could overstep  _ that _ boundary. Kate reluctantly removed herself from Max’s lap. “I guess we need to head to class.”

Max got back to her feet and Kate couldn’t help but marvel at how impossibly cute Max was with her hair messed up. “We should probably fix ourselves up a bit so we don’t give Victoria any more ideas.”

“Just wait until she sees you without a hoodie on, I can only imagine the ideas she might get.”

Once they’d straightened their hair, smoothed out their clothes, and given up on waiting for their blushes to fade, the pair headed out of the dorms and split off towards their separate classes.

Kate settled down in her life drawing class, her hand remarkably calm for the first time that day as she set out her pencils.

The PA system crackled into life and the hair on the back of her neck stood up. “Attention students, this is principal Wells. While normally I refrain from making announcements in this manner, I feel that in light of the recent tragedy that has befallen our school, that I must share this news immediately. Rachel Amber was found alive this morning and is currently recuperating in hospital.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing, and to LtDax, [Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluekip) for betaing.
> 
> Whew, that chapter was a doozy. Kate just cannot catch a break, huh?


	8. Dawn

There was utter silence for a few heartbeats as people stared at each other in shock. Kate quietly hoped nobody was looking at her. Then people started pulling out phones and talking excitedly. Juliet darted out of the class, presumably off to start writing an article for the school paper.

The teacher, Mr. Chavez does nothing to stop anyone as a few students follow Juliet.  _ I need to talk to Max, figure out what we’re going to do. We shouldn’t know Rachel, oh I was never a good actor, just trying to keep Max’s secret is hard enough.  _ She fished her phone out of her backpack and fired off a quick text to Max.

[Kate | 1:13pm]

What are we going to do?

[Max | 1:14pm]

What can we do? We just try to play it cool and go see Chloe tonight. If we’re lucky Rachel will be in the same hospital.

[Kate | 1:16pm]

Okay, what do we do if she’s there?

[Max | 1:17pm]

Follow her lead I guess? She’s the one with acting experience, according to Chloe. Also, maybe we should bring her some silver to wear so she doesn’t turn while in the hospital.

[Kate | 1:18pm]

Sounds good, I’ll go to my room between classes and grab something.

“Pretty exciting, huh?”

Kate’s head jerked up to see Dana smiling at her from the other side of the desk. “O-oh, yes. I don’t know her but I’m glad she’s okay.”

“I hope you get to meet her, she’s pretty awesome. It’s crazy that they found her at all.”

Kate nodded, doing her best to keep her expression as neutral as possible. “It is. I hope nothing bad happened to her.”

“Juliet was spouting off some crazy stuff about Jefferson being involved since his death and her reappearance were so close together.”

It took a moment for Kate to respond, and then a second moment to remember how to breathe. “T-that would be pretty crazy. I, um, can’t imagine Mr. Jefferson of all people doing something like that.”

If Dana noticed, she didn’t react. “I know, right? He just doesn’t seem like the shady type. A little edgy, but not like that.”

Kate nodded a few times and Dana flashed her a smile. “Are you two going to go see Chloe again tonight?”

“Uh, yeah, t-that’s the plan.” Kate tried to salvage some composure but, judging by the broad smile on Dana’s face, she had nothing to fear.

“It’s so cute that you two are there for her.” Dana carried on, and Kate felt her cheeks heating up. “I hope you can figure things out soon.”

“Dana, please, not in public...!” Kate hissed, her eyes darting around with a rising panic. Her hand started trembling again.

“Relax Kate, I’m not Jules and nobody is paying attention. The only person left in class in Daniel right now, anyways.” Dana shrugged, a smirk playing across her face. “Although judging by your face something’s changed.”

“I-I… Dana please, I really don’t want to talk about this until the three of us have it figured out. Especially not in public.” Kate’s eyes fixed on Daniel, tension flaring before she saw earbud chords trailing from his ears.

“Okay, yeah, sorry. I’m just excited for you, it was getting a little embarrassing watching you stare longingly at Max and nothing happening.”

“Danaaaaaaa, stop!” Kate groaned as she buried her burning cheeks in her hands.

“Fine, fine. Say hi to Max for me, okay?”

Kate let out a sigh of relief when Dana walked back to her desk.  _ Okay, I really need to try and calm down. I’ll just sketch out this teapot and hopefully that’ll pass some time. _

__

She managed to keep her head down from the rest of the day. Nobody seemed particularly interested in her. Most people were swapping wild rumours and speculations about Rachel that didn’t come close to the real insanity of what had happened.

Max, on the other hand, was not so lucky. She was publicly Chloe’s girlfriend, and since Chloe had been Rachel’s girlfriend and the only person still actively searching, Max was swamped with people asking her questions she couldn’t truthfully answer.

Fortunately, Max was quick to respond with “I only know what you guys know, Chloe’s not awake yet.”

Nobody was about to challenge her on that.

Victoria was conspicuous in her absence. After the news she had stormed off with a weird look in her eyes, according to Alyssa who had been in the same class. Dread pooled in Kate’s stomach. She’d known through rumours that Victoria and Rachel had never gotten along very well, but storming off during class?  _ Oh I hope she doesn’t think Rachel appearing is connected to Nathan’s disappearance, or this might get really ugly. _

__

Kate was grateful when the final bell for the day rang.  _ I’ve never had a school day feel quite so long before. _

She fished out her phone and shot Max a quick text.

[Kate | 5:02pm]

I’ll meet you in the dorms, I need to give Alice some time out of her cage.

[Max | 5:03pm]

Sounds good, I’ll take any excuse to play with Alice.

[Kate | 5:04pm]

I think we could both use a little break.

Max giggled softly as Alice flopped over in her lap. Kate marvelled at the sight. She knew what Max was capable of, the changes to her body that she was hiding under her baggy hoodie. And yet… she was still Max. The Max who made it impossible for Kate to run from how she felt, the Max she had made out with just a couple hours prior. Not the rather chaste peck she’d given Chloe when doom had been staring them in the face, but just giving into her desires for a few glorious moments.

She felt her cheeks heating up the memory and shook her head.  _ Not now, just try and relax, we can stress when we get to the hospital and get started on homework. Ugh, it’s so hard to even care about homework right now, or even school for that matter. It just feels so pointless. Max is a werewolf but I have to write an essay about Kant! _

With a sigh Kate lay back on her bed, just listening to Max cooing to Alice and letting her stress slowly bleed off.  _ I wonder how long it’ll take Chloe to wake up? She’ll probably be in a lot of pain when she does. Will she ever be back to normal again? I hope so.  _ __

Rolling over, she watched Max with Alice some more and tried to imagine what it would be like to actually be in a relationship with Max and Chloe. She felt her imagination resist the temptation like she had so, so many times before with Max, but she pushed back against it. Max and Chloe, sitting there on her couch, laughing and playing with Alice while she… what? Played with them? Just watched like she was doing now? Just did her own thing?

_ You’ll never really be a part of what they have. Their bond is so special, and you’re just an interloper.  _ A treacherous voice whispered in her mind. She took a breath to calm herself, before imagining herself on the couch with them, next to Chloe with her infectious energy spurring her on to playfulness and adventure. Or perhaps next to Max, the two sharing in the peaceful relaxation of their tea sessions while Chloe busied herself with Alice or some video game. Then there was the spot between them. It felt like a violation to separate them with herself, but at the same time, she would be in the focal point of their joy and affection for each other, and maybe even for her.

What would it be like, to be sandwiched with so much love?

“Kate? Hey Kate?”

Kate snapped out of her reverie to find Max giving her a quizzical expression, a tuckered out Alice in her arms. “Oh, sorry, I was daydreaming.”

“I figured, what were you daydreaming about?” Max lightly teased with a soft smile as she gingerly placed Alice back in her cage.

“U-um, you two, and me. Together, what that might look like.” Kate confessed, her cheeks were warm again and no doubt Max already knew something was afoot.

“And?” Max lightly prompted as she picked her bag up off the ground.

“It’s… I’m still not sure what to make of it. It’s still all so scary and new. Four days ago I’d never even kissed a woman, even though I kind of really, really wanted to. Now I’ve kissed both of you and life just won’t slow down enough to let me think.”

“I know what you mean, the hospital should be quiet enough that we can just talk and keep an eye on Chloe.”

“And if Rachel is there?”

Max shrugged. “If she is, we just play it by ear. Oh, and we give her some silver.”

“I already put some in my bag.” Kate affirmed as she started getting to her feet. “Let’s go see her.”

“Max!” Joyce’s voice greeted them in the hallway. “I’m so glad you’re here. And you’re back again, Kate?”

“She’s a friend in need.” Kate explained, hoping that Joyce wouldn’t read too much into things.

“Well aren’t you just a little saint. The world could use more people like you.”

Kate felt the heat rise in her cheeks as Max chimed in. “How is Chloe doing?”

“About the same, I just hope David isn’t causing problems with his racket.”

“What’s David doing?” Max asked with a hint of an edge to her voice.

“The usual, arguing. He doesn’t want Rachel visiting Chloe for reasons I cannot fathom. You’d think be happy that she’s been found but…” Joyce sighed and shook her head. “That man just gets in a certain way. Maybe you two can talk some sense into him.”

“We’ll see what we can do.” Kate offered as Max started walking toward Chloe’s room like a woman on a mission.

She walked briskly to catch up to Max, who was emitting a soft growl. “I can already hear that asshole, he’s trying to use me to keep Rachel from seeing Chloe.”

“W-what? What on earth is with that man?”

“He’s an asshole. He hits Chloe, who knows what else he does?”

Kate felt a bit of a lump in her throat as she remembered Chloe’s tearful confession. Before she could reply, they rounded the corner and she saw David and Rachel in an animated argument. It took her a moment to even recognize her as Rachel, her matted mess of hair had been buzzcut off. She couldn’t quite hear them yet, but David pointed at Max with a sneer on his face.  _ Oh no. _

Rachel wheeled around, her scowl flashing into a quick, devious smile before changing to a more neutral expression as they neared. “You must be Max. I’ve heard quite a lot about you.”

_ Okay, so we’re going with ‘we don’t know each other’, just play along. _

“And you must be Rachel, I’ve heard a lot about you too.” Max said, her voice flat.

“I told you she moved on.” David growled. He didn’t look happy to see Max, but apparently he was happy to use her to win an argument.

“That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be able to see her.” Rachel retorted. “You don’t mind, do you Max?”

“I think we have a lot to talk about anyways.” Max nodded, “besides, I’m sure Chloe would be happy to have you around anyways.”

David grunted and Kate moved behind Max a little to avoid his glare. Rachel’s tone was almost sing-song as she turned to face him. “So if you don’t mind Mr. Madsen, we could use some space.”

There was another grunt and Kate could see David tense up for a moment before shaking his head and storming off down the hall. Rachel flashed them both a little smile and gestured to the door to Chloe’s room. “Shall we?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New texting format because I hated the old style and the new one is much easier to type.
> 
> As usual big thanks to my betas and my editor, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter!


	9. Catching Up

Kate softly shut the door behind her and turned her attention to Rachel, who was circling around to the far side of the bed. The sorrow in those hazel eyes was palpable as they all stared at Chloe.

Rachel sighed and shook her head. “Oh Chloe, you always were stupidly brave.”

“She’s always acted like she was invincible, even when we were kids.” Max agreed as she pulled a chair up next to the bed. Kate hovered by the door, unsure where it was an appropriate place to stand, given that both these women were Chloe’s ‘official’ girlfriends. Maybe. Everything was so terribly confusing and, without Chloe waking up to set the record straight about what she wanted, all they could do was try their best not to overstep each other's boundaries. 

“Thanks both of you, for getting her out. I was too focused on Jefferson to really do anything.”

“What, um, happened to him?” Kate ventured, her need for answers overriding her desire to stay out of things.

Rachel’s face contorted into a grimace and she looked away. “He’s gone, they’ll never find either of them.”

“The news said they found his body in his house after a fire.” Max said in a carefully neutral tone.

Shock took over Rachel’s face as she slowly leaned against the far well. “What? That’s… I didn’t do that, that wasn’t his body. I killed him not long after you left and they’re both buried deep up there.”

“Wait, so if you didn’t…” Kate started, her gaze darting from Rachel to Max.

“Then who did,” Max continued, “and who did they actually find?”

Rachel bit down on her lower lip and shook her head. “I have no fucking clue.”

“Why did you wait so long before getting found again?” Max asked, a hint of accusation in her tone.

“Because if I showed up within a day of something happening to Chloe, Nathan and Jefferson, then people might start jumping to conclusions, don’t you think?” Rachel sighed. “I mean they’re still going to fucking jump to conclusions which is why I’m going to tell the cops tomorrow that Jefferson kidnapped me.”

Kate immediately felt panic rising in her chest. Max tensed up. “Is telling the police actually a good idea?”

“It’ll be fine.” Rachel said with a shrug. “My dad is the DA, if I tell him that I just want this to be over, he won’t push. Plus, with Jefferson’s death already being in the news I can just spin it, say he skipped a visit to my prison and I took that as my cue to escape. You two got rid of the gun, right?”

Both women turned to Kate, who flinched. “I-It’s in my room, I hid it with my… underwear. I just panicked and didn’t know what to do with it!”

A small smirk played over Rachel’s lips. “I guess not everyone gets to listen to the DA boasting about how idiot criminals get caught. Look, you need to ditch it somehow.”

“W-we’ve still got Chloe’s things in her truck, maybe we can sneak it in with those things when we bring it all back to her house?” Kate offered as she fidgeted. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears at the thought of even touching the gun again, but she couldn’t exactly let Max touch it without her looking at her unmentionables.  _ Oh I really don’t have time to think about why that’s so exciting! _

“Fucking Madsen has to know it’s missing. That won’t work.” Rachel pursed her lips as she crossed her arms and tapped her finger against her elbow. “What if…”

“I mean, Kate’s dorm is as good as any hiding place.” Max volunteered. “We might need to deal with whoever set fire to Jefferson’s house if they try to make trouble, and no one is going to suspect Kate of anything.”

“That so?” Something in Rachel’s playful tone made the hair on the back of Kate’s neck stand on end. “She does look the part of a good Christian girl…”

“I can keep hiding it for now, it’s not a problem.” Kate volunteered, no matter how much she really wanted that reminder of Nathan’s death gone.

Kate could feel the tension between the two other women as they looked at each other over Chloe’s unconscious form, culminating in a mutual nod. Kate’s hand started to gently shake again as she stared right at the elephant in the room.

It was Rachel who spoke first. “Speaking of problems…”

“Yeah.” Max’s voice was soft yet steady.

“This is already enough of a mess as it is.” Rachel’s eyes filled with sadness as she looked over to Chloe. “I guess she… moved on without me. I can’t really say I blame her, I was sort of already doing that with Jefferson. I mean she did find that note I was too much of a coward to actually give her.”

“What  _ were _ you doing with Jefferson?” Max asked with enough venom to get a wince out of Rachel. 

“I… He was going to be  _ our _ ticket out of Arcadia. I was getting as close to him as I could so he could set me up with contacts in LA, so we could just up and go. Then, well, you know the rest.”

“We or you?” The venom was still very much in Max’s voice and Kate flinched from the bluntness of the question.

“What’s that supposed to mean Miss ‘not a word for years’?” Rachel’s eyes narrowed as she leaned forward, a low growl coming from each of them.

Before she knew what she was doing, Kate was at the foot of the bed, holding up a hand to each of them. “Please don’t fight you two! We’re all on the same side here, we just want Chloe to be okay!”

Both heads snapped toward her. Max’s face softened immediately but Rachel’s face remained hard before she sighed and looked at the floor. “Yeah. I had a lot of time alone to just think about things, and I’m starting to wonder if being in a relationship just… isn’t for me. Like nothing against Chloe, she’s great, but I don’t like being tied down.”

“You did say you were moving on yourself.” Kate prompted despite her racing heart. “So there’s no reason to fight, right?”

“Right.” Both women agreed and all eyes turned to Chloe.

“I hope she wakes up soon.” Max half whispered, her voice wavering with emotion. “I hate seeing her like this.”

“Mrs. Madsen did say that they were going to keep her out for a few days. After that I’m sure she’ll be right back with us.” Kate spoke with more confidence than she really felt, moving over to Max and laying a hand on her shoulder.

Max leaned into the contact and Rachel smirked softly at Kate. “I see why they brought you in. Chloe always did need a ray of sunshine in her life.”

Heat rose in Kate’s cheeks as Max placed her hand on top of Kate’s. “Me too. Especially now.”

“I-I… thanks but…”

Max smiled up at her. It was a small, fragile smile, yet warmth blossomed in Kate’s chest at the sight of it. “I know, but we’ll figure it out.”

“Chloe never could take no for an answer.” Rachel said with a soft snort. “Everything is just a problem waiting to be solved. That’s what I always loved about her.”

“I know what you mean.” Max softly agreed. “It didn’t matter how bad my meltdowns or panic attacks got, she’d find a way to pull me out of it when we were kids. And when it turned out I’m what I am, she started researching things right away. She even bought a bunch of books about it.”

“I-I haven’t really known Chloe for very long, but I don’t think I’ve ever met someone quite so determined, generous or kind.”

“Don’t let her hear that last part.” Rachel snickered. “She’ll just mope about losing her ‘tough girl cred’.”

Max giggles. “She really is a giant softy though, when she lets herself be one.”

“I hope you two don’t mind me visiting her. I’m going to be stuck in this hospital for a few more days and who knows how long it’ll be before I can get ‘finishing high school’ ironed out.”

“Can you imagine if you ended up back at Blackwell? I think Victoria would lose her mind.” Max laughed. “But no, it’s cool. I don’t think any of us want her to be alone longer than she has to be.”

“Oh, that reminds me! I brought you some silver.” Kate reached into her bag and started fishing around for the bracelet she had grabbed earlier.

“Thanks, my mom is going to visit and bring me some things from home” Rachel flashed a brilliant smile that made Kate suddenly understand why everyone at Blackwell had been so fond of her. “My earrings have silver in them, which was probably why Jefferson didn’t like me wearing them. It should help until my mom arrives, I’ll just have to be careful.”

“Found it!” Kate pulled the bracelet out. It was a simple band with an engraved floral pattern.

“Jesus! How do you wear that?”

“It really hurts at first, but then it feels more like a bad rash until your body wants to turn.” Max said with a shrug. “But I’m getting used to it, I just need to be careful not to pick at the skin.”

Before Kate could suggest that Rachel find something to bite down on, she put the bracelet back on. Rachel’s face contorted in pain and Kate looked away, the memory of how much Max had suffered still fresh in her mind.

To her credit, Rachel didn’t cry out, there was only a hiss of pain before she collapsed panting on the end of Chloe’s bed. “Okay, okay, I did it.”

“Do you want to stick around? We need to get to our homework.” Max said as she pulled up another chair which Kate gratefully took.

“I should probably get back before my parents do. My dad always hated Chloe, he blamed her for getting me in trouble over shit I usually dragged her into. She might not have gotten expelled if I hadn’t come along, but she’s always been the ‘broken girl from a broken home’ to him. Fucking asshole.” Rachel sighed. “I’ll catch you two some other time.”

“Thanks for being there for Chloe when I couldn’t. I’m sure she’ll be happy you’re visiting her.” Max stood up and shared a quick hug with Rachel.

“Take care, Rachel.” Kate said with as much of a smile as she could muster.

Rachel gave them both a warm smile before she slipped out the door. Max leaned over the back of Kate’s chair and wrapped her up in a hug. “That could have gotten ugly, thank you for bringing me back from that.”

Kate reached up and gently rubbed her hand over Max’s head. “I’m glad I could help.”

“We should probably get to our homework.” Max pulled back from the hug and sat down in her chair.

“Probably.” Kate teased as she pulled her own books out from her bag.

The words of Rachel’s dad rattled around in her head.  _ I don’t think I can really argue that Chloe doesn’t come from a broken home, with what I know about David. Though, I don’t think Chloe is really broken. She’s hurt and she needs somewhere safe she can heal. I wonder if working things out between the three of us can do that? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usual thanks to the usual people for their awesome work.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, because it's going to be the last for about a month if all goes well, two to three otherwise. I'm taking a hiatus from publishing for a couple of reasons, first and foremost Seasonal Affective Disorder. When it's pitch black out before 4pm, I just lose the will to do much of anything. Beyond that, I'm trying to avoid the burnout I feel coming. I've published nearly 300k words in 6 months, and written almost another 100k more. That's a lot of content in a short span of time, and I've got some exciting projects coming up that I'm sure you'll all be super stoked for.
> 
> That said, this fic ain't dead, I just need a break from the time crunch of needing to publish on a set schedule. Once I have a decent backlog built up again I'll start hitting publish again. My other fics will probably get sporadic updates, most of them have chapters that are 80% or more written up so you'll still get _some_ content from me. Just not the deluge you've all come to expect. As much as I love writing and sharing that writing with you, I've been neglecting other areas of my life to do it and I really need to stop doing that.
> 
> Hopefully I'll see you all again soon.


	10. Staring Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW: PTSD flashbacks and nightmares.

Metal rattled in her shaking hands as she tried to keep them steady.

“Kate, please!” He pleaded, his eyes wide.

Kate swallowed hard against the lump in her throat as she tried to keep the gun steady on Nathan. Her breathing came in fits and starts as her aim wavered. Her eyes glanced down to Chloe. A panicked gurgle escaped her throat as she tugged at Nathan’s foot that was pressing down on her throat. Chloe’s eyes begged Kate to pull the trigger.

Dread filled her veins, ice cold, chilling her heart as her aim wavered under the weight of that pleading, desperate look on Nathan’s face. “I don’t deserve to die!”

Chloe gurgled again, her eyes bulging slightly as his boot pressed down harder against her neck, slowly crushing her throat.

Tears slipped free as Kate tried to will her hands steady, trying to warn him off with the threat of the gun alone. Nathan’s hands clasped together as he dropped down, seemingly unaware that a knee was pressing into Chloe’s windpipe. Tears tumbled from Chloe’s beautiful blue eyes as the spark of life started to fade. “Please! You don’t have to do this!”

Her finger started to tighten around the trigger as Chloe’s flailing limbs lost their intensity.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered as her finger finished its travel, the cylinder cycling into place with a sharp click before the hammer falling.

Kate bolted upright, panting heavily, her body drenched in sweat. Her head darted around her dark room, expecting Nathan’s pleading eyes to be staring from any nook or cranny.

There was only the twilight gloom.

“Dream. It was just a dream.” Kate muttered to herself, her voice shaky as she swung her feet out from under the covers. She recoiled when her foot met something that wasn’t supposed to be there. After a moment of peering into the gloom she could see it, eyes adjusted. It was the pillow with Max’s hoodie. Before she could breathe a sigh of relief, there was a knock at the door that made her nearly jump out of her own skin.

“Kate?” Came Max’s voice, soft and concerned. “Is everything okay?”

“Y-yeah.” Kate pushed herself to her feet and made her way to the door to open it. “Just… had a nightmare.”

Max’s face was the picture of worry as she glanced both ways down the hall before whispering to Kate. “You were calling  _ his _ name.”

She winced, the dread from the dream coming back in force as she opened the door to let Max in. “Loud enough for anyone else to hear?”

Max shook her head as she entered. “No, but you were getting there. I was about to wake you up but then I heard you getting out of bed.”

Kate closed the door softly after Max and the two hugged each other tight. She felt herself shuddering despite herself, clutching at the other woman as she started to cry. Max held her tight, gently swaying back and forth with her as the stress leaked from her face. “I-Is it going to b-be like this, all the t-time?”

A sob broke free from her lips as Max gave her a squeeze. “I-I don’t know… I hope not.”

They stayed like that, Kate’s hands balling into fists in the fabric of Max’s shirt as she cried quietly. Max whispered soothing words Kate couldn’t process as her mind played back fragments of the dream. She heard Nathan’s pleading, saw Chloe’s beautiful eyes losing that spark of life and mischief, felt her finger curling around the trigger. Another sob threatened to spill from her lips, which she stifled it into Max’s shoulder. To her credit, Max just kept holding her, whispering softly in that kind, gentle voice of hers until Kate was left feeling drained. “T-thanks Max, I, um…”

“It’s okay, but… maybe you’d feel better if you weren’t sleeping alone?” Max asked as she rubbed circles into Kate’s back.

“I… sure. That sounds really nice actually. I just hope nobody catches us in the morning…” Kate sighed as she pulled back from Max. “I really need to splash some water on my face, then I’ll join you in your dorm?”

“Are you going to be alright by yourself?” It warmed Kate’s heart to see just how concerned Max was, enough for her old nervous habit of clutching her arm to come out for the first time since she’d been bitten.

“I, um, I should be, it’s just the bathroom, right?”

“Yeah, and it sounds like everyone is asleep, so you should be fine.” Max nodded while she worried at her lower lip. “Do you want me to like, wait in the hall or something?”

“No, I think it’s okay.” Kate said, trying not to laugh at just how cute Max was being. “Besides, if something happens you’ll hear it, right?”

Max nodded some more and turned to open Kate’s door. Kate followed her out to the hall before sharing a quick hug with her and heading towards the bathrooms.  _ I guess this is what I should expect from her now? I mean she was really nice to me before, but I kind of like the new overprotective Max. Oh lord, Chloe is going to be even more protective when she wakes up. What am I going to do with those two? Chloe with those lanky arms around me, Max by my side… that sounds pr- _ Kate covered her mouth as she choked back a scream. Nathan’s face leered at her from the bathroom door. She stumbled back a step, dimly aware of footfalls approaching her as she stared at his face, rendered in black and white. Above was the title, “MISSING”.

Her eyes roamed over the poster, staring without absorbing the details as she struggled to remember how breathing worked. She jumped as a hand touched her shoulder, turning to find Max staring at her, eyes wide. Kate simply held a hand up to the poster, hoping that would answer Max’s unsaid question. Max’s eyes followed hers and she winced before wrapping Kate up in a hug. Kate leaned into the embrace for a few moments before pulling back and staggering off towards Max’s dorm, her mind too tired to deal with anything anymore.

By the time Max was nestled in beside her, Kate was already sliding back into an exhausted but thankfully dreamless slumber.

*****

Morning came quickly, as it always does. Kate groaned in protest as consciousness intruded on her cozy oblivion in Max’s arms. Her eyes fluttered open as she heard a soft giggle from beside her. That insidious little part of her started screaming about what she was doing, how many lines she was crossing and how easy it was for them to be caught like this. Max hummed as she brushed Kate’s bedhead out of her face.

Looking down at her was Max’s adorable smile, those soulful eyes sparkling with so much joy it made her chest ache.  _ How can this possibly be wrong, all this joy and love I feel? _

The urge to kiss Max felt like a physical force was drawing her to those soft, chewed lips. She wanted to oblige it so, so badly.  _ I guess I’ll just have to kiss Chloe a whole bunch to make up for kissing Max without her around. _

As if reading her thoughts, Max leaned in and pressed her lips against Kate’s. The tender sweetness was such a stark contrast to the desperate making out of the prior day. Her heart craved more as Max started to pull back and Kate surged up after her, slipping a hand up behind Max’s head to capture her lips once again.

She lingered there, indulging in the tender sweetness that was kissing Max, more than a month of yearning had manifested in this at long last. In the back of her mind Kate knew she needed to get up quickly, to scurry back to her room to hide what she had been up to lest word somehow get back to her mother. The little happy noise Max made in the back of her throat silenced those thoughts, for a moment.

But that moment ended as Max finally broke free and gave her a big, dopey smile as she giggled. “Well someone’s awake.”

Kate sighed dramatically as she ran her fingers through Max’s hair. “Sadly. I wish I could sleep through the whole day.”

Max giggled some more as she sat up and perched precariously on the edge of the narrow bed. “Same, but I can hear some other people starting to wake up. As much as I hate it, you should probably get back to your room.”

With a groan Kate pulled Max’s covers off of her. “I can’t wait until it’s the three of us in Chloe’s bed again.”

“Oh yeah?” Max asked as she stood up from the bed, offering Kate a helping hand.

Kate took it and Max hauled her out of the bed with startling ease. “Yeah, as… interesting as Chloe’s room is and how terrifying everything that happened was, waking up next to you two was… kind of magical. I think I’ll always remember it.”

A blush crept it’s way over Max’s face as she gave Kate’s hand a squeeze. “I will too. Now come on, we can be all mushy when it’s safe.”

Kate’s heart ached for Max’s touch the moment she was out in the hallway, alone again. She slipped back into her room and stared off into space, the warmth in her chest slowly fading away.

There was a thump.

She turned to find Alice doing the bunny equivalent of glaring at her and winced, she hadn’t been giving her nearly as much attention as she normally did. “Sorry sweetie, mommy’s just been very busy.”

Thump.

“Don’t you pout! I’ll let you out, just no hiding under the bed!”

Thump.

Kate groaned as she undid the clasp on the door of the cage. “Such a fussy bunny. Fine, have some free time while I get ready, okay?”

The moment her feet touched the floor Alice was racing around the room and Kate couldn’t help but laugh. She sat down on the foot of her bed and hugged the pillow with Max’s hoodie tight, watching Alice dashing about.

Her phone started buzzing and her head jerked to her bedside table. The name on the caller ID turned her blood to ice.  _ Oh no, mom. _

As much as she didn’t want to hear her voice, she didn’t have much of a choice if she didn’t want there to be hell to pay.

“H-hello?”

“KATE BEVERLY MARSH! WHY WERE YOU NOT AT MASS?!” Kate winced and held the phone away from her ear. “DO YOU KNOW HOW BAD THIS MAKES US LOOK?!”

“I-I’m sorry mother.”

“If you were actually sorry would you have told us  _ before _ we left why you weren’t going to be there.” Her mother accused, venom dripping from her voice. “And yet you didn’t tell me before, after or yesterday.”

“I am sorry! My friend, she-”

“No excuses! I don’t care about what the harlots at that ‘school’ are doing. You skipped out on your obligation to God! I should have never let you go to that school.”

“Mother!” Kate pleaded. “My friend is in the  _ hospital _ !”

There was a beat of silence. “The hospital?”

“Yes! We were out hiking, the three of us, to get pictures for photography class. She slipped and fell down a cliff. We had to carry her back to the road and get her to the hospital. I’ve been helping her.” Kate squeezed her eyes shut as she made the only move she really could. “It was the Christian thing to do.”

There was more silence. “… I suppose.”

She held the sigh of relief inside of her. “I couldn’t just ignore a friend in need, mother.”

“Which friend? I don’t remember you talking about many.”

Kate did her best to keep her voice from wavering, “I told you about Max, Max Caulfield.”

A silence settled that ate away at Kate’s soul like acid.

“Is that who the Price girl is dating now instead of the Amber tramp?”

“W-what?”

“What those two little disgusting dykes are up to is talk of the town. It’s shameful, I don’t want you associating with them, you’ve already brought enough shame on us without associating with  _ those _ freaks.”

Kate closed her eyes, doing her best to keep from crying audibly on the phone. Her grip on the phone tightened as she did her best to lie, no matter how hard “S-she’s my f-friend. I’m trying to g-get them to see God’s light. C-Chloe’s in the hospital…”

“You went  _ hiking _ with those degenerates?! Kate what will people think?!”

“I-it was for class, we needed to do nature photography.”

“Hmph. Very well. I expect you to go to confession at once to atone for missing mass and that you’ll be there this Sunday. I’m sure everyone will love to hear your little story about trying to get those harlots to accept the Lord into their hearts.”

Click.

The sigh came out and she sagged onto her bed, her back hitting the wall as she closed her eyes and silently prayed for strength and forgiveness. But mostly strength. _Oh Lord, please grant me the strength I need to not fall apart when she casts me out for who I am._ _Oh she’s going to disown me at least, probably kill me. I’ll never see my sisters again, Dad will hate me…_

She shook her head, trying to focus on the thoughts and feelings from Max just minutes before. The feelings she’d had when she’d shared her first kiss with Chloe’s chapped lips. And yet, compared to Nathan and Jefferson, her mother seemed a whole lot scarier. A heavy sense of doom filled her chest as she imagined the inevitable confrontation when she revealed who she really was. The vile things her mother would scream, the crash of family heirlooms being thrown and if things got bad enough the sting of her mother’s hand on her cheek.

Dread mixed with the sense of doom as the day sat awaiting her. Dread of seeing Nathan’s posters up around the school, dread of looking into the eyes of the woman who had no doubt put them up. It made her ache, all these lies she held tight to her chest.

_ I wonder if this is how Nathan felt watching Chloe put up those posters? _ She jolted at the thought, even comparing herself to him felt… wrong. Yet she couldn’t deny it.  _ I just hope Victoria didn’t put up too many posters… _

_ I need to go to confession. I need to be absolved of this sin and repent. _

*****

Kate’s hopes died the moment she saw the main building. Courtney was taping up posters to the windows as she approached with Max. Inside there were Vortex club members putting up more posters and Taylor was sitting at a small table with a sign up sheet for a club trip to Portland that weekend to look for him.

Kate wanted to run back to the dorms, to hide in Max’s arms and cry until the day was over and she could finally confess her mortal sin. Max stayed by her side as they walked to class, and how she ached to take her hand in her own.

Victoria sneered at them as they walked past, but blissfully said nothing before returning to putting up her posters.  _ I just need to keep my head down today, everyone is busy gossiping about Rachel, hopefully nobody will pay us any mind. _

_ ***** _

Kate managed to spend the day enjoying relative obscurity, but Max was swamped as soon as they reached the cafeteria. Max gave her a quick nod that she took as her queue to escape the scrutiny as the questions about Rachel filled the air.

She managed to grab lunch and started heading for their usual table with her head down and without anyone paying her any mind. Not that people largely ignoring her was an unknown state of affairs, aside from her usual friends and the bullying from the Vortex Club, she might as well have been a ghost.

“Hey Kate.”

In a panic her head jerked up to see Juliet grinning at her like a cat who’d stolen a fillet of fish from the table. “O-oh, hi.”

“Have a seat, I don’t bite!” Juliet said with a soft giggle.

_ No, but you’re a terrible gossip pretending to be a reporter. _ “Um, okay.”

Gingerly Kate took her usual seat, which happened to be across from Juliet. “Poor Max, so many questions, huh?”

“I suppose.” Kate replied while looking at her food, quietly hoping that Juliet would take the hint and leave her alone.

No such luck existed. “She’s gotta just be exhausted from all the people asking her about Rach.”

“One would imagine.” Kate stabbed a french fry with the flimsy plastic cafeteria fork.

She heard some shuffling on the other side of the table and could see Juliet resting her elbows on it in her peripheral vision. “They don’t know what they’re doing, amateurs. Don’t follow the herd, find the source nobody is looking for.”

With a shudder Kate mentally braced herself for the follow up. Juliet, true to form, just plowed ahead. “So tell me, how  _ is _ Rachel? I know you’re going to the hospital with Max to visit Chloe, there’s no way you didn’t see her.”

_ Oh would you please just leave me alone! _ Kate resisted the urge to scream, an unfamiliar rage boiling up inside of her at this violation of her space. She flicked her gaze up, sure enough Juliet’s eyes sparkled with amusement and her lips were curled in an insufferable smirk.  _ How can I get her to just leave me be! _

The idea hit her like a lightning bolt and she straightened her back, giving Juliet the best fake smile she had learned from years of being her mother’s daughter. “Why yes, we did actually.”

The honesty clearly caught Juliet off guard but she quickly recovered. “How is she? What did you talk about?”

“She’s doing very well, shaken but in good spirits.” Kate couldn’t help but grin inwardly as she made her play. “We had a lovely discussion with her about what it’s like being a werewolf.”

Juliet scowled. “Don’t bullshit me Kate, that’s ridiculous.”

“Oh it’s very much the truth Juliet, she had a lot to say on the subject.”

“Okay, fine, if you don’t want to talk, you don’t want to talk. You can just  _ say _ that instead of trying to snow me.” Juliet stood up in a huff, picking her purse up from the seat next to her.

“Can I?” Kate asked, letting a little venom seep into her voice. “That rarely seems to be an option with you.”

Juliet muttered something under her breath and stalked off. Kate relaxed and started eating her slightly soggy fries.

Max joined her a little bit later, with Warren and Alyssa in tow. Max gave her a concerned look and Kate simply shrugged as she let Warren fill the air with some old horror movies he’d watched the night before.

*****

“Are you sure telling Juliet like that was a good idea?” Max asked as she fretted with her bag, packing up all the things she’d need to go see Chloe.

Kate could only shrug. “She clearly didn’t believe me and I don’t think anything else would have gotten her to leave me alone.”

“It was just so not like you to pull something like that.” Max said with a note of concern in her voice.

“I’ve been doing a lot of things lately that aren’t exactly what I normally do.” Kate said with a nervous laugh. “But after everything, I guess I was going to change, right?”

“True… but you’re still Kate Marsh, thank god.” Max hummed to herself as she hunted for a book she needed to write a report on. “Are you sure you don’t want to come tonight? After that call with your mom I thought you might want to just have some quiet time with us.”

“I do.” Kate confessed, rubbing a hand on the back of her neck. “But I do need to go confess for… you know.”

“Is that wise?” Max finally found her book under a pile of papers next to her laptop. “I mean, what if the priest goes and tells the cops?”

“Max, please, the seal of confession is sacrosanct. I don’t think it’s even legal for a court to try and get him to talk.”

Max shoved the book in her bag along with her laptop. “Okay, but I can drive you there in Chloe’s truck, or pick you up after.”

“Picking me up after would be nice.” Kate said, nodding her head. “But I want to get there on my own. It’s… an act of penance I guess.”

“An act of penance?” Max asked, cocking an eyebrow and putting a hand on her hip. “Are you making yourself suffer just to make up for… you know?”

“I feel like I have to, alright? Like I owe it to him.” Kate rubbed her arm as Max started towards the door.

“Come on, let me drive you at least. I think your nightmares are torture enough.”

“I don’t want to keep you away from Chloe.” Kate protested, but already she felt herself crumbling to Max’s offer, despite her desire to self-flagellate.

“You’re keeping yourself away from Chloe too.” Max said as she waited next to her door. “Besides, if you’re going to get that off your chest, you could probably use the emotional support anyways.”

“That… actually sounds really nice, thank you.”

*****

Max gave her hand a squeeze as they sat in the parking lot outside the church. Kate took a deep breath as she tried to steady her nerves.

Max’s hand slid up Kate’s arm and rubbed in circles over her back. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Y-yeah. I just… need to do this.”

With a nod Max leaned in and planted a tender kiss on her cheek. “I can’t say I get it, but… I’ll be here waiting for you.”

“Thanks Max, it means a lot.” Kate said as she leaned in to return Max’s kiss with a quick peck on her lips, enjoying the jolt of thrill and warmth that blossomed in her chest.

“Any time.” Max replied with a warm smile.

With that Kate opened the truck door and slipped out into the chilly night air. She tried to hold onto the warmth in her chest from being around Max, but it faded further with each step toward the front door. She pushed her way inside the unfamiliar church. She’d made a point of picking the church her family didn’t go to, it wouldn’t be unlike her mother to have been waiting for Kate there to grill her about what was going on, and getting caught with Max in Chloe’s truck would have ruined any chance at things turning out okay.

The church was pretty much deserted, with another lonely soul occupying a pew near the front and a priest setting out fresh votive candles on a stand. She picked a pew near the back to use to examine her conscience.

She clasped her hands together and softly muttered. “Come, Holy Spirit, enlighten my mind that I may clearly know my sins. Move my heart that I may be sincerely sorry for them, honestly confess them and firmly resolve to amend my life. Spirit of Wisdom, grant me to see the malice of sin and my ingratitude toward You, the all-loving God. Spirit of Fortitude, help me to make whatever sacrifice is needed to avoid sin in the future. Amen.”

_ Okay, so, missing Sunday Mass, killing Nathan, being rude with Juliet, lying to Victoria, David and Joyce… and falling in love with Max and Chloe. _ Her heart and soul rebelled at the idea of naming the nascent feelings she had for Max and Chloe as a sin. The very idea cut deep and burned hot, but the scripture was the scripture and she needed to confess it. At least, that’s what the rules said. She flinched, it was one thing to defy her mother, but God? The Church?

_ How could something fill me with so much joy yet be a sin in the eyes of God? Are we not here on this earth to love each other and Him? Why would my love for them be wrong when it feels so pure? _ She gripped the back of the heavy wooden pew in front of her, her knuckles quickly turning white as she tried to wrestle with the turmoil. The rules had been ingrained deep into her mind since she was a child. She needed to confess for  _ everything. _ No matter how small, no matter how much she didn’t consider it to be a sin, if the Church considered it sinful, she needed to say it.

For the first real time in her life, she felt trapped by those rules. Sure her mother had used them against her on many occasions, but those had been her, not the rules themselves. She’d chafed under them since meeting Max, as her feelings had slowly intensified and she had kept trying to justify to herself why they weren’t lustful and sinful.

And then Chloe had come along.

Kate had always found, if not joy, at least some solace in the strictures of her faith. The comfort of a familiar and known routine. Rules that she could follow like a lawyer, clear and precise.

She stood and started walking towards the confessional booth. The church was more in the old style than her usual one, and the booth was the small wooden kind typically seen in movies. If she hadn’t felt so conflicted, she could have laughed, between werewolves and her sudden involvement with two women who made her head spin, her life very well could have been a movie.

Her hand gently trembled as she slid the door open. The war over if she should confess about Max and Chloe raged in her mind as the minutes dragged on. Eventually, the door on the other side opened and shut. A gentle yet deep voice rumbled through the screen. “Good evening, my child.”

Kate knelt on the pad and slid the door shut behind her. She made the sign of the cross. “Father, Son, Holy Spirit. Forgive me father, for I have sinned. It has been 10 days since my last confession.”

She rattled off every minor slight she could think of, every time she had been rude to someone, when her temper had flared over something trivial, all to buy time as she grappled with her choice. Finally she came to the heart of it all. She could feel the tears start to roll down her cheeks. “I missed mass last Sunday. My friend, she… I… there was this fight. These two men had us cornered. She tried to fight them and she got hurt so, so terribly. H-he… he was going to k-kill her a-and then m-me. I managed to grab her gun and… and I-I shot the man who hurt her like that… I killed him Father. I… I… he tried to beg me for mercy and I-I ended him. W-we managed to get my friend to h-hospital and… and I lied to her mother and step… father about what had happened to her. I-I lied to his best friend about it too. I… telling them the truth would… it would put another friend in danger.”

She reached up with a sleeve to wipe her tear streaked face. “I-I’m s-sorry for these sins, father.”

Long moments of silence stretched out before the priest cleared his throat. “My child… killing someone to save the life of another is not a sin. Especially not when there is more than one life at stake. You should remember this from catechisms 2263 through 2267.”

“F-forgive me father…”

“It is okay, my child. Killing a man is a terrible thing, it’s understandable that you’re in such a state.”

“Thank you father.”

There was another moment of silence and Kate screwed her eyes shut. “As for the other deeds which stem from it, lying is a grave sin, my child, even if done to protect the life of another. Pray to God and St. Gertrude the Great for forgiveness for this sin as your act of penance.”

“Yes father, thank you father.”

“Now say the Act of Contrition out loud my child.”

Kate swallowed past the lump in her throat and spoke despite how dry her throat was and how much it burned. “O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended you. I detest all my sins because of your just punishment, but most of all because they offend you my God, who is all good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of your Grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin. Amen.”

The priest muttered a quiet prayer on his side of the screen. “You are absolved of your sins my child.” Kate made the sign of the cross and he continued. “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good.”

“His mercy endures forever.” Kate breathed before getting back to her feet and leaving the booth. She started to make her way to the pews, filled both with a sense of relief and hollowness. The priest had confirmed what so many things told her, that killing him had been the right thing.  _ The second shot just put him out of his pain. He already died. _ And yet… she hadn’t confessed, not properly. Omitting Max and Chloe and her attraction to them made the act incomplete, if it was in fact a sin to love them.

Habit took over as she took her place among the pews, going through the motions of her Hail Mary and a half hearted prayer to the saint. She ached so badly to be back in the truck with Max that she simply scrambled through the motions and hastily made her way back out of the door. She could see Max sitting in the truck, fretting with Chloe’s beanie only to perk up the moment she spotted Kate. Chloe’s truck roared into life as Kate opened the door and slid into the passenger seat. Before Max could even ask her about it, she grabbed her tight and started to sob into her shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, thanks to [sly.sketcher](https://www.instagram.com/sly.sketcher/) for editing.
> 
> Hey everyone, it's been a while, so it's time for some housekeeping. First off, this fic is clearly not dead, given the huge chapter I've just dumped into your laps, but it's also not off hiatus. Sucks, I know. Between my concussion getting worse and work getting crazy, I've decided that I really need to switch gears when it comes to how I publish. What this means is that this fic is at most going to update sporadically until it's done. I don't really know how long that's going to be, given all the things that are going on, but I can tell you that I'm a quarter of the way done if my outline is anything to go by. I know waiting sucks, but thems the breaks.
> 
> At any rate, I hope you enjoyed this extra long chapter!


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